Most people at this age begin to experience a decline in vital activity. However, this is not an axiom for everyone. Many people at this age are just beginning to gain momentum in their professional activities. At this age there is often a change family relations. Children create their own families, and the new parent must rebuild his self-concept again. Time is becoming increasingly valuable.

At the age of 42, many women fall into one of two extremes: either they lose interest in surrounding events, or they begin to dress inappropriately for their age and look younger. This happens due to the awareness of quickly passing time. Now no one calls her a girl, but I don’t want to let go of my youth. Therefore, the discrepancy between reality and desire leads either to a loss of strength and mood, or to rebellion, expressed through makeup and modern clothes.

Men spend most of their time working. They strive to realize themselves in the labor sphere, establish themselves in society, and secure a future for themselves and their family. It is difficult for him to quickly switch from one activity to another, so even at home he can work or discuss work.

Physiology of age

At 42 years old, a person gets tired more often. Activity decreases as most of the time is spent on work. Body proportions change.

Restructuring of a woman’s body leads to thinning of the skin and an increase in the number of wrinkles. The first to appear in men's hair White hair. A decrease in the performance of some organs becomes noticeable. This leads to a slowdown in metabolism, deterioration of blood supply and digestive tract function.

Age statistics

The population of the Russian Federation in this age period (40-44 years) is 10,368 thousand people. Of these, 4994 thousand are men, 5374 thousand are women.

From the population of this age group employed in the Russian economy is only 13.7%

You were born in 1976 or 1977

August 22. The automatic station “Luna-24” has returned from the Moon. It was launched by the USSR with the aim of delivering lunar soil.

1977 - 1st of January. For the first time, a woman was ordained to the clergy in the Episcopal Church in the United States.

May. A household video cassette recorder was created by the Japanese company SONY.

1978 - January 23. In Sweden, for the first time, the use of aerosols was banned because they harm the environment.

22 of October. In the Vatican, Karol Wojtyla was elected Pope - John Paul II - a man who played a significant role not only in the spiritual, but also in the socio-political life of Europe.

1979 - May 4th. Margaret Thatcher became the first woman prime minister in the British government.

Elections to the European Parliament took place for the first time. The process of political consolidation of European states began.

November 12. The Voyager 1 spacecraft flew 185 thousand kilometers from Saturn. Thus it was obtained detailed information about the planet, its rings and satellites, and the discovery of 13, 14 and 15 satellites.

Implementation latest technology, which made it possible to print newspapers without human touch. The first newspaper published using this technology was the leading Japanese newspaper Asahi Shimbun.

1981 - October 23. Registration begins in South Africa mixed marriages as a challenge to apartheid policies.

1982 - September 14. The first commercial hearing aid (“artificial ear”), produced by the Australian company Nakleus, was implanted in a patient.

Scientist Robert Jarvik created an artificial heart. He developed and implanted a practical modification of the Jarvic-7 on December 2, relying on a base of prototypes. Doctors have a new opportunity to save thousands of lives.

1983 — An artificial human bone was created in Japan.

American geneticists Andrew W. Murray and Jack W. Shostak created the first artificial chromosome, which, due to the content of the yeast genome, could exist outside the set of chromosomes. This chromosome is used for cloning large DNA fragments.

1984 — American surgeon W. G. Clewall from the University of Colorado performed a surgical operation on a child in the womb.

1985 - 16th of May. The beginning of the anti-alcohol campaign in the USSR by decree of the Prisidium of the Supreme Council “on strengthening the fight against drunkenness.”

November 19. The meeting between Gorbachev and Reagan took place for the first time in Geneva. After this (two years later), “perestroika” began in the USSR - a set of reforms in the social and economic sphere.

1986 - February 20th. The first manned research orbital station, Mir-1, launched by the USSR, began operating. She operated until March 23, 2001, when she was disabled and sunk in the Pacific Ocean.

26 April. At the Chernobyl nuclear power plant, located near Kyiv, a power unit exploded. The Soviet authorities released a message about this only after Finland, Denmark and Sweden reported an increased background of radiation in their territories. About 600,000 people were involved in eliminating the consequences of the accident, many of whom died from radiation sickness and other diseases associated with the results of radiation.

1987 - May 29. A small plane piloted by Matthias Rust, a 19-year-old West German citizen, landed on Red Square in Moscow.

The first experimental laser vision correction operation was performed. It was performed by Columbia University doctor Steven Trockel, who, in collaboration with other scientists, published several papers describing the benefits of an experimental laser for corneal tissue in surgery to correct myopia, hyperopia and astigmatism.

Yasser Arafat, leader of the PLO, recognized the existence of the State of Israel.

1989 - January 11. The Declaration prohibiting the use of poisonous gases, chemical and bacteriological weapons was signed by representatives of 149 countries.

March 27. A state of emergency has been declared in the United States after the Exxon Valdez tanker was damaged in Prince William Sound. As a result of this damage, approximately 64 million liters of oil leaked into the sea on March 24.

November 9. The East German government announced the opening of the border with West Germany. On November 10, East Germany began demolishing the Berlin Wall.

1990 — August 6. The UN Security Council approved a resolution imposing a military and trade embargo against Iraq. A protracted oil and military conflict with Iraq began.

November 22. The “Iron Lady” of world politics, Margaret Thatcher, Prime Minister of Great Britain, publicly announced her resignation.

December. A referendum was held in Croatia regarding secession from Yugoslavia. The overwhelming majority of citizens voted to leave. The formal disintegration of Yugoslavia began.

1991 - The 25th of January. Iraq is dumping oil reserves into the Persian Gulf. This threatens an environmental disaster.

December 8th. Representatives of Russia, Belarus and Ukraine sign an agreement on the Creation of a Commonwealth of Independent States, to which 5 more countries of the former Soviet Union join on December 21.

December 25th. USSR President Mikhail Gorbachev resigns. The USSR officially ceases to exist.

1992 - February 2. In many CIS countries, economic reform began, which consisted of price liberalization - the abolition of centralized price controls.

The beginning of the era of GSM communications. This year, Germany launched a GSM communication system, which was subsequently used as a prototype for many operators around the world.

The 4th of October. Government tanks are being shot at The White house in Moscow. As a result of the incident, 150 people die. The system of power in Russia has changed dramatically. This marked the beginning of the creation of a presidential-parliamentary republic.

12 December. Referendum on the adoption of the Constitution Russian Federation. 58.4% of citizens were in favor of adoption.

1994 - January 31. The first images from the Hubble Space Telescope, which photographs galaxies on early stage their development.

the 6th of May. The Channel Tunnel, connecting England and France, was opened. The total length of the tunnel is 50 kilometers, 38 kilometers are laid under the sea itself.

December 11th. The fighting began in Chechen Republic. The troops of the Russian Federation begin fighting. Fighting did not stop until the agreement to end the war in Khasavyurt was signed (until 08/30/1996).

The first book on CD appeared in the USA. By the end of the year, most encyclopedias had been created or translated into this format.

1995 - 20th of March. Nerve gas was used in the Tokyo subway in Japan, killing 5,000 people and killing 12. On May 16, Soko Asahara, the leader of the religious sect Aum Shinrikyo, was arrested.

The first artificial liver was tested, performed by German surgeon Peter Neu Haus.

1996 - 4th of July. B.N. Yeltsin becomes President of the Russian Federation for the second time. This is the first time the same person has been re-elected to the post of President of Russia.

A test began to be used to detect AIDS. Proteins produced by the virus were detected in the blood, which made it possible to diagnose the disease at an early stage.

1997 - February 22. Scottish scientists announced the birth of the only surviving embryo, a clone of an adult sheep. Dolly was born on July 5, 1996 without any abnormalities and lived until February 14, 2003 as an ordinary sheep.

4th of July. A rover designed to collect and analyze Martian soils has landed on the surface of Mars.

1998 — August 17. In Russia, the ruble depreciated, which led to an aggravation of the economic crisis. The country's government resigned.

September 24. The first transplant of a limb from a deceased patient to a living one took place. A hand and forearm were transplanted in the city of Lyon, France.

12 December. The first organ transplant to a child was performed in the United States. A three-year-old Florida boy received a heart, lung and liver transplant at a Pennsylvania hospital.

1999 - 1st of January. Most countries of the European Union have switched to paying in the new European currency – the euro.

March 24. The first NATO air raid was carried out on Yugoslavia. The US invaded a sovereign state that was not threatened by a third party.

2000 - 26 March. Election of V.V. Putin to the post of President of the Russian Federation. The official inauguration took place on May 7.

A robotic developmental doll has been created in the USA. She knew how to talk, laugh, cry, blink, make grimaces. In the process of communicating with people, she increased her vocabulary and reached the development level of a two-year-old child.

The first medicinal products were created in Novosibirsk, the prefix “Bifido” was added to the usual name. They contain a liquid concentrate of bifidobacteria, which have a positive effect on the intestinal microflora, prevent the development of pathogenic microbes and nourish the body with B vitamins and vitamin K. Such products quickly gained popularity among buyers.

2001 - January 15. The official launch of the English site Wikipedia took place - a resource that today has become an assistant in quickly obtaining encyclopedic data in all areas of life.

11 September. The largest terrorist attack in world history was committed in the United States. As a result, the Pentagon was damaged and destroyed Shopping mall, and human losses amounted to about three thousand people.

2002 - 1st of January. The European Union introduced euro coins and banknotes, which became the single currency for most EU countries and played an important role in stabilizing the global European economy.

October. After 50 years, restoration has begun railway between North and South Korea.

October 23. In Moscow, Russia, Chechen terrorists took hostages at the Nord-Ost theater center on Dubrovka. Three days later, on October 26, all the terrorists were killed during the assault by special forces. One of the hostages died from a bullet wound, the remaining 116 people died from exposure to the gas used during the assault.

2004 — Bloodless revolutions took place in Georgia, Ukraine, and Kyrgyzstan, as a result of which more democratic leaders came to power.

1st of May. The European Union has expanded its scope with the inclusion of ten new countries.

2005 - 5 January. Eris, the largest of the dwarf planets in our solar system, has been discovered.

2006 - March 29. The first total eclipse of the sun in the 21st century could be observed in Russia.

24 August. Scientists have stripped Pluto of its planetary status. This decision was made at the congress of the International Astronomy Union in Prague, Czech Republic.

2007 — Genetics have discovered modifications in the human body that are responsible for the development of certain diseases. After DNA analysis, it became possible to identify a predisposition to certain diseases.

November 4. Presidential elections took place in the United States. The first black president in the history of the state, Barack Obama, became the head of the state.

2009 — August 17. A disaster occurred at the Sayano-Shushenskaya hydroelectric power station. Hundreds of people became victims. The cause of the problems was a series of shortcomings and a failure in the redistribution of electricity in the power system.

2010 - 18th of March. Russian mathematician Grigory Perelman proved the Poincaré conjecture, which was considered one of the unsolvable Problems of the Millennium. For this, the Clay Mathematical Institute awarded him a prize of $1 million, which he refused.

April 10th. A plane crash occurred over Smolensk, in which Lech Kaczynski, the President of Poland, his wife Maria Kaczynskaya, the high military command, Polish politicians, as well as religious and public figures (97 people in total) died.

The first living cell was created in which its own DNA was replaced with DNA created artificially. Humanity has received new tools for developing technologies for artificially growing organs.

2011 - 11th of March. In Japan, off the northeastern coast, an earthquake occurred, the magnitude of which reached 8.9. As a result of the earthquake, a devastating tsunami arose, as a result of which over 15 thousand people died, several thousand are considered missing.

May 2. Osama bin Laden, the “No. 1” terrorist in the world, the leader of Al-Qaeda, who, in particular, is considered responsible for the September 11 terrorist attack, was killed.

September 7. An international charter flight crashed near Yaroslavl. On board the plane was the team of the Lokomotiv hockey club, which was flying to Minsk. 44 people died, one survived.

2012 - February 21. In Moscow, in the Cathedral of Christ the Savior, a scandalous punk prayer service of the PussyRiot group took place, three members of which were detained by the police.

December 1. Russia has headed the G20 (G20), a forum of representatives of countries with the most developed economies: Australia, Japan, Argentina, South Africa, Brazil, South Korea, Great Britain, France, Germany, Turkey, India, USA, Indonesia, Saudi Arabia, Italy, Mexico, Canada, China.

2013 - February, 15. A meteorite fell in the Urals - the largest celestial body that collided with the surface of the Earth after the Tunguska meteorite. Because of the “Chelyabinsk” meteorite (it exploded in the vicinity of Chelyabinsk), 1,613 people were injured.

February, 15. Asteroid 2012 DA14 flew by at the minimum distance from planet Earth (27,000 km). This was the closest distance in the entire history of astronomy.

18th of March. Putin V.V. signed an agreement on the admission of the Crimean Peninsula and Sevastopol to Russia. This agreement comes into force from the moment of ratification by the Federal Assembly - March 21.

2015 - Jan. 7. A terrorist attack took place at the office of the satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo in Paris, based on a caricature of the Prophet Mohammed previously posted in the magazine. 12 people were killed and 11 people were injured.

There is a seven-year, rather simplified, full life cycle of human development that tells a lot about a woman’s ages. Its “authorship” is attributed to different cultures. But one thing is certain - that the “magic” number seven very well reflects age boundaries.

• Up to 7 years - child,
• Up to 14 - girl,
• Until 21 - young woman,
• Up to 28 - warrior,
• Up to 35 - mother,
• Up to 42 - wife,
• Up to 49 - woman,
• Up to 56 and beyond - wisdom itself.

Further, some say that cycles repeat themselves, while others say that by the age of 56 a woman has either learned the hidden wisdom and can be “the oldest woman of the family,” the voice of Nature itself, or not. Now let’s talk about the age-related psychology of a woman and the full life cycle of human development in a little more detail.

Only with seven year old age, a “genderless” person becomes a girl and feels that she belongs to the female gender, although the first thoughts about obvious signs of her own “otherness” are formed at the age of 5. A from 14- feeling your own emotional impulses, it’s time to fall in love and the emergence of strong feelings.

From 21 years old a new time begins. The girl, who previously experienced her first feelings and studied the inner world, becomes interested in the outer world. Diana the hunter, warrior, trying her hand at the real world and interested in literally everything - this is a girl under 28 years old. The first successes inspire you, the first wounds make you think.

And so, by age 28 the girl comes with a solid store of knowledge. And even if she got married at 20, then, by the standards of developmental psychology, only by the age of 28 does a girl reach the age of mature and blessed motherhood - such is the human life cycle. And there is something absolutely right about this - only by acquiring your own knowledge can you pass on something significant to the next generation.

Before 35 a woman enjoys the happiness of motherhood and building a “hearth,” comfort, everyday life and her own “cell in society.” But as she gets closer to the next milestone, she discovers that she has other interests. And all the previous ones - family, home, stable and very comfortable work - were just a protective shell behind which one could hide from adversity and do what is most natural for a woman - giving birth and raising children.

It was at the age 35-42 years old women update their social status, change jobs and even family - the feeling at this moment is so great that everything needs to be done all over again. And preferably - the best way, because there will be no time to change...

By the age of 42-47 a woman either calms down in her own loneliness and status as a “divorcee”, or is already completely confident in her family. It is to this age that the concept of “woman” is most applicable - confident in who she is, what she is capable of, and much more. The blessings are becoming more and more, spiritual strength and opportunities are also increasing, but the physical decline is not yet felt too acutely. By the end of this period, the woman finally asks herself the sacramental question “who am I”, “why am I here”, “where do I come from”...

And now these are not those superficial questions that are asked by teenagers or warrior maidens who conquer the world - this is a real journey into yourself. She finally looks into the abyss that opens before everyone. This dialogue with eternity promises either a return to momentary interests and living the lives of children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren... or true wisdom, which finally comes by age 56.

Any developmental psychology, the full life cycle of human development from the beginning to spiritual infinity, is, of course, very conditional. There is room in them for 2-3 year discrepancies, and for real deviations - when one or another person seems to be “stuck” at one stage or suddenly returns to the previous round of the cycle. But any “inconsistency” with even a conventional life cycle still looks very unnatural.

A young “fatal beauty” at 45-50 years old, darting her eyes like a young girl exploring the world, or a young mother who has grown old at the wrong time, giving up her hands, dispensing advice without gaining enough wisdom - are equally difficult to understand. And even if subconsciously, without understanding the reason, those around her are perplexed - how can she do this? Therefore, do not rush yourself, grow the way your soul wants. After all, no one will live your life for you - neither your family and friends, nor “society”.

This study will be most useful to those who are twenty or thirty today. Because I myself am thirty now, and I understand that this is the “golden time”. Time is an exhaustible resource, and every age has its own. There is an age to study, there is an age to get married, there is an age to give birth, there is an age to raise children, there is an age to do something good in the world, and there is an age to pray. And 30 years in this regard is the age for almost everything.

Judge for yourself - I still have health, don’t worry. There is a lot of strength, there is energy, optimism. There is already independence from parents and a certain internal maturity - you no longer have to prove anything to them. I have an understanding of what I want, what I like. That is, I already know myself – at least a little. I can still have children. I have a head on my shoulders - I’m already thinking about the consequences of my actions. In general, I can do a lot of things.

But there is a paradox - when there is a lot of things to do, it is easy to get lost in all the diversity. Choice for a woman is generally a terrible thing. How to distribute priorities? What's the best thing to do at thirty? Build a career? Run around the stadium? Give birth to children? Do charity work? What can you put off until later? Will I go to church then? Then will I learn to cook? Then I'll see the world?

Actually, understanding all the hardships of making a choice at such a golden age (although each age has its own advantages), we conducted a study.

• We surveyed (at the time of writing the review) 1966 women average age which amounted to 46,7 years.
• There were 16 main questions.
• It was possible to mark several options, so the total was more 7500 replies.
• Among the respondents there were those who were 38-39, and there were also those who were 69-78.
• Thank you to all those who shared their opinions, stories and thoughts with us.
• We had to filter out a little more for those who are not yet 40 - or even close - fortunately, there were few of them

So we asked women what they regret now in their thirties. What would they do differently, what would they advise others. And based on the results, this is the TOP 5.

5th place

Regret about not strengthening the relationship with her husband – 601 people – 30% of respondents

Indeed, this is common in the world. Children are born, there is work, plans, a lot of energy. And one forgets that there is still a husband nearby. Who needs our love, who also wants a little of our care, and who also needs our trust and admiration.

“I gave birth to three children one after another. And my husband was happy with me. We raised them together. But almost always we were only parents. We stopped being a couple. We only talked to each other about children. We did everything for the sake of the children. Now the children have left, and we are left alone with each other. I don’t know this man, as if it wasn’t with him that I recently celebrated my thirtieth marriage anniversary.”

Marina, 56 years old

“When I got married, everything was great. Then we decided it was time to have children, and our eldest came along.Having gone to work, I understand that without a higher education I can’t get anywhere (I had a secondary vocational education at the time), my husband is in favor. I got carried away with my studies, at the same time I gave birth to my youngest child, and I decided that since God gave it, my husband is happy, so be it. It was very difficult to juggle everything, but my parents helped, my husband used to give me lectures, babysit the children, and in general we managed - I graduated.

I went to work in my specialty, and things started happening. At first it’s not much, what’s wrong, I devote all my evenings to work, only in the evening, and then more, and I didn’t notice, I have no time to walk with the children, sit in an embrace with my husband, bake a homemade pie. But before, there was time for all this and much more, and most importantly, strength.

Now I don't know what people do in their free time. I’m going through the first few days when I go on vacation. And the worst thing is that if I set aside time for the children because I have to, then I don’t always spend time with my husband, he’s an adult, he’ll understand. As a result, we have been sleeping separately for about five years now, somehow I didn’t even notice when this happened. And now I have to restore this relationship."

Irina, 38 years old

“We grew up in a time of a different ideology. We were raised to be workers, activists, all for the good of the Motherland. I remember writing in my diary that we had a test of satiety, and regretted that there was no room for heroism.

Subsequently, everything was at the request of the workers - difficulties, lack of money, the nineties, and so much personal misfortune and grief. Many at that time could not cope with life circumstances. I was lucky to stay on my feet, perhaps due to my short stature and strong figure, and mental strength.

Therefore, to all young girls and young women, I wish you strength of spirit, self-confidence, and most importantly, not to be and not to strive to be a lonely and self-sufficient lady. Girls, it is better to be a wife and mother than to be a good worker.. Work will not embrace you and will someday throw you overboard, there are many of us out there. There is nothing better than family, better than children and grandchildren, and of course, reliable loving husband. I always dream of uniting everyone in pairs, I know a lot about solitude and I don’t wish it on anyone! Be loved and happy, love yourself!”

Tatyana, 59 years old

4th place

Regret that all efforts were spent on work, but there was no time for loved ones - 674 people 34% of respondents

This is a typical situation of that time, when it was a shame not to work, to be a dependent. And kindergartens, after-school programs, and camps were in the order of things and were considered a huge benefit for everyone. Women built BAM, a career, a bright future.

Although now the situation is not much different - the percentage of workers married women now even higher. Women now do business, build careers, and many higher education receive. To be independent, self-sufficient, to provide for yourself and your family, your children, everything you need - and even beyond that. Buy an apartment, a car, a dacha, a vacation, a lot of toys...

Is it correct? Are we missing something by being in the office most of the day, without our loved ones, outside our home? It turned out that many women regret that they did not see their children grow up and could not be with them. Some initially set priorities differently, some decided to change this order of things already in the process, and some realized the consequences only much later.

“Now I understand that all my problems with my daughter come from the fact that I never strived to be her mother to the fullest. I always felt like a specialist, first and foremost, a highly qualified engineer. Therefore, I worked a lot and was constantly away on business trips. When my children were sick, my husband and grandmothers were with them. But not me. I had no time. And today my daughter is almost forty. We have no dialogue with her. She's ruining her life and I can't do anything about it."

Irina, 62 years old

“I got married early. My three beautiful beloved girls were born in the marriage. In the intervals between children, I received an education (first I graduated from a sewing school, and then from a pedagogical institute), but I was not able to work in my specialty. All my attempts to build a career ended in endless illnesses of children and various kinds of difficulties at home.

And then one day my husband and I decided that it was time to stop these senseless attempts at my “work,” and I finally settled at home. But one thought kept nagging me all the time: many of my friends are successful and have built brilliant careers, but am I going to sit around my pots all my life? I lived with this question for several years.

But one day a friend of mine, a businesswoman (successful by society’s standards in everything - career, car, apartment), came to visit us. My daughters and I were bustling around in the kitchen, baking pizza, and my friend was sitting on the couch watching us.

And suddenly I saw tears in her eyes and she told me: “Lord, how happy you are!” and at that moment all doubts about my failure to succeed disappeared like smoke! Suddenly it dawned on me - I AM THE HAPPIEST, THE MOST SUCCESSFUL AND THE MOST NEEDED!!!

There is no greater happiness for a woman than to be loved, wanted and needed. But a career and a car will not hug you with warm, dear arms around your neck and bake pizza with you! My life, thank you that you turned out this way!”

Natalya, woman 40 years old.

“My friend is 38 years old. Her child is the long-awaited and first, he is 4 years old. He started going to kindergarten. After a month of battle with him, the teacher called his mother to scold her for some misdeed of the baby.

We listen to the monologue of the teacher's aunt: “I tell him - you are a bad boy, because ......” And this impudent one answers her - “If you knew how much my mother loves me, then you would not say that.”

Mom was called to scold precisely for this impudent phrase!

If I knew how my love could protect my baby in the fight against the system, I would do just that. As it turned out, my daughter, going to 1st grade, could not defend herself from the first teacher (the class was ballet, and she hit the children’s heads on their desks, and this is the city of Kharkov, not some village). I found out about this today when my daughter told me after 6 months of sessions with a psychoanalyst. I would never have known.”

Olga, 48 years old

This topic is very relevant for me, and I always think about how not to go too far, how to distribute forces. The most important question I ask myself is if I do this and that, what will my children do? I remember my childhood too well. My mother raised me alone, she studied and worked. That’s why I often spent the night with friends; my mother’s friends picked me up from kindergarten. Once they even forgot to pick it up - and I still remember that evening. And at home I felt unbearably lonely and sad. I missed my mother very much at that time. And I try to do it differently for my children. To be close, to be with them.

“At one time, I was a working mother and wife with a strong focus on self-realization in the outside world. It got to the point that I, as a chief accountant, sometimes left a sick child at home alone at the age of 5-7 during the reporting period and went to work. Grandmothers had not yet retired either, so there were few options.

I worked 10-12 hours a day and only had time to put my daughter to bed when I came home from work. At the same time, there was no task to feed us myself - I was married. But stereotypes imposed from outside also controlled me - the pursuit of social success, income, beautiful status things, vacations at resorts, etc. - all this was more important to me than the physical and mental health own child.

This is how we lived - my husband and I spent the whole day in offices, and our daughter was alone at home. And when I was laid off at one job and set up for another, years of correcting mistakes began for me. With baby. My daughter’s physical, and especially mental, health left much to be desired. Life forced me to stay at home (although, out of inertia, I still periodically continued to look for a permanent job), and I simply became a mother for many months and years. Through observation came realization.

Priorities have changed dramatically. I learned again to love my now fully grown daughter, to welcome her home from school in grades 9-11, when I didn’t do this in grades 2-3. I began to have long, intimate conversations with her, to unravel her tangle of psychological problems, accept her with all her characteristics, treat her wounded heart with care and love.

Gradually, difficultly, step by step, the situation began to improve. But I almost lost her in every sense of the word. Now I have a completely prosperous, talented, adult child, with whom we have built a small harmonious family, where love and care reign. And if life puts me before the choice of “work or family,” I don’t even have any doubts about which to give preference to.”

Galina, 42 years old

3rd place

Regret that I traveled little and saw little - 744 people - 38% of respondents

Strictly speaking, even at eighty years old it’s not too late. These are not children who have grown up and flown away, nor are they of childbearing age, which has its limits. The problem is that in our country, when we retire, we lose the opportunity to live and begin to survive. Our pensioners do not travel around the world like German or American ones. Maximum - only for the dacha.

Therefore, for those who are retired here, it seems to me, two components are important.

• I didn’t travel when I could have earned money and saved for it.
• Now I could travel, but I don’t have the money (or health) for it.

Maybe that's why we haven't been sent any stories about this. Imagine, out of 700 stories, not a single one is about travel or countries. This makes me think about how much this is our desire, and not a vector of society.

Let’s also remember that 40 years is not retirement yet – you can do everything! The children have grown up, if there are any. And there are still opportunities - and there may be everything ahead!

Traveling is not necessarily far, long and expensive.

2nd place

Regret that she gave birth to few children - 744 people 38% of respondents and another 113 people who regret abortions

There was no such item in the survey, but many people wrote about it in their stories - so I would like to add here - that they had an abortion. I don’t want to quote many such stories here, they are almost all about one thing - an abortion done when I was young, and then a long inability to carry and give birth to a child. There were more than 60 such stories, many simply added in the survey that they regretted abortion.

“I really regret the abortions I had. I thought I still need to learn, I’m very young, this man is not so smart, responsible...etc. (if he’s not like that... why sleep with him? You have to think first, and then start a close relationship.)”

Irina, 38 years old

"If at least one girl in difficult situation This will help to stop and give time to think, I will be glad.Married for 20 years. She got married deliberately. And no matter how life turned, it was always based on feelings from childhood. From the age of 7-8 I knew that I would definitely get married and have many children. From the age of 15-16, a firm conviction appeared that marriage was once and for all. Pregnancy came before the wedding. I had an abortion. In 1993Now look at the chronology: 1994 - surgery (ectopic pregnancy).1995 — premature birth, the son died two days later.1998 - full-term birth, daughter dies after two operations.2000 - miscarriage at 6 months.2001 - frozen pregnancy at 12 weeks. And this is called OAA-complicated obstetric history.Traditional medicine could not explain anything.All. This is where my persistence ended and my husband and I “closed this topic.” Then, a few years later, there were a couple more pregnancies. It ended very early, so it was no longer a big shock for me. Bottom line. Our daughter is now 3 years old, she is our fairy tale girl. It's a gift for us. In all senses. Prayed and suffered. I did it. How it was given to me and my husband, only God knows.

Take care of yourself. Treat yourself more carefully!”

Natalya, 39 years old

And the point about having a small number of children firmly took second place. Some did not dare to have a second child, some settled on two, and some regret that they did not give birth to even one.

“When I was twenty, it seemed too early to have time. Everyone was giving birth, but I was waiting for something. My husband asked me to have a baby, but I asked him to wait. There is still work to do, we need to fulfill the five-year plans in three years. Then it was thirty. It was too late to give birth according to society, but I decided that my time had not yet come. The prime of my life and my career. The husband was waiting. Fourty years. I promised him every time that next year- I’m successful, I’m the boss.

When I was 43, he left. To another. Younger. Which immediately gave birth to two children of the same age. And then one more. And I was left with nothing. I didn’t need a career, a huge apartment, or a car. Nothing. I tried to get pregnant and it didn’t work. I even turned to doctors for help.

Today I’m almost 60. My friends are already grandmothers. I smile in their faces and tell them that I don’t regret anything. But I have a huge pain in my heart that I didn’t do the most important thing. I haven’t dedicated myself to anyone, and now no one needs me. Don't repeat my mistakes!!!"

Olga, 58 years old (woman over 40)

“I wanted to achieve financial independence and started looking for different ways building a business. The guna of passion took full possession of me, and for 13 years I fell out of women's life, and was looking for opportunities to build a business. Damn, I regret these lost years now! Because at that time it was the time between 30 and 40 years old, the time when you need to build a family, give birth to children. It’s good that I managed to give birth to a daughter while married. And during this time I did not live as a woman at all - no men around, no creativity, the house was abandoned, only thoughts about how to earn more money.

The most interesting thing is that nothing worked for me, but I tried harder. There were so many tears, difficult professional relationships, and disappointments during this time. The result of all this is predictable for those who study knowledge - complete emptiness in the soul, no money, no relationships. Thank God that at that time I attended Gadetsky’s lecture, and I had the intelligence to understand it and turn my life around.

But as soon as I stopped looking for an opportunity to make money, it “came to me” good job in the specialty that I studied for right after school, and from which I went into economics to be able to earn more. Money began to come to me easily.

And most importantly, love came into my life, I met worthy man. Yes, a completely different life has begun, and one could have enjoyed it much more if not for age. Whatever one may say, every age has its own task. At my age, I already need to learn to be a grandmother and pass on wisdom to the younger generation. And I’m just learning this wisdom myself and dreaming of more children. Because it is unacceptably small to give birth and raise only one child. Yes, I have grown up to be a very good daughter (although I now have to change many of the male attitudes that I had instilled into female ones), but I dreamed of more. Yes, you can change everything after 40, but it is much more difficult. Therefore, realize that you are a woman as early as possible, and believe that if you realize your feminine side, everything else in your life will definitely work out.”

Tatyana, 45 years old

“I had no relatives in my city, and my mother died. The eldest daughter was 9 years old. I got pregnant with twins There is a crisis in the “yard”, unemployment, I have no job at all. The husband said that there were no twins in his family and it was unknown where such a pregnancy came from... he left. My daughter and I were left alone. It was very scary how I was alone without my husband, mother, or relatives.

When I was pregnant, my girlfriends secretly took patronage over me - almost - they were nearby. Things for the baby, like in a fairy tale, appeared from somewhere (either girlfriends would bring them, then there would be an opportunity to earn money and buy them, or they would just be given by almost strangers).

She gave birth to two wonderful boys, herself. No caesarean. Yes, it was very uneasy, physically difficult - the boys suckled breasts every 2 hours, the automatic machine simply burned out after 2 weeks of continuous operation. But magically, the machine appeared, and the diapers were given by strangers with whom I had previously worked.

Everything was very difficult, but now my daughter is 21, the boys are 12, and we remember with smiles how our uncomfortable huge stroller overturned when I left my daughter alone to bring groceries home, how we simultaneously woke up from the silence in the house, and our ugly ones learned untangling the elastic bands on the cabinet doors and scattering all the bulk products in an even layer throughout the apartment. It was and is very difficult.

But if God gave you children, the whole universe will support you! This I now know for sure.”

Lada, 42 years old

“I got married at 25 and gave birth to my eldest daughter at 26. The birth was difficult because I got caught up in the shift change of the medical staff and no one cared about me. Head injury in a child. The doctor stated that he would be disabled. However, the daughter pulled through. I am a doctor myself, I understand perfectly well what the consequences could be. Problems before school: logoneurosis, stuttering. Speech therapist, injections, massage, but the improvement is not great. She was strict with her daughter and listened to all the doctors. There is zero contact with my daughter. She was not allowed to hug or kiss herself.

There was no talk of a second child. A stranger’s grandmother gave advice: pray and wish for your daughter’s health, and also ask for the children. I am a Muslim by religion, I went to the mosque, bought prayer books with translation into Russian and slowly started.

14 years have passed, we study in a regular school, in regular class. Although our first grade teachers assigned us to special education, we did not give up. Yes, we will not graduate from college, but we will have secondary vocational education. My daughter loves me, we have a trusting relationship with her as much as possible. And I don’t insist on either A’s or B’s. The most important thing is her happy eyes, that she likes studying in this class, that she likes her teacher. And thank God for everything! He gave me the strength to overcome this lesson!

Thank God for my second daughter. Her love for us was able to cure me and my eldest daughter. Through my second daughter, I understood and accepted a lot. My advice to you: do not be afraid to give birth to second and third children, even if you have problems with the first. Their and your mutual love will give you strength and help!”

Lera, 41 years old

Although in fact even here it is possible different variants- any age. If there is a desire and aspiration, there is love in the heart that you want to give to children...

“Our daughter was born in 1992. We lived and worked at BAM. The purposeful collapse of the road and everything connected with it began. They didn’t pay wages, there was nothing to live on. We moved to the Caucasus, but to fit into new life It didn’t work... Almost 10 years of terrible poverty... We didn’t think about any more children... Then it became easier. Now we have two adopted daughters, 8 and 12 years old, the eldest is a psychologist in her 5th year. What I mean is that it’s never too late to make your dreams come true.”

Lyubov, 53 years old

1 place

Regret that “threw myself into the far corner” – 998 people, 50% of respondents

It won by a huge margin. The undoubted leader of the survey. And very understandable. It's so typical of women to give. We are designed in such a way that it is easy and pleasant for us to give. We give life to children, we give our bodies to men, we give food to our families, clean laundry... It’s so easy to get caught up in this and become completely empty. It’s so easy to chase “goodness” and always give everyone what they want. Completely forgetting about myself.

This is safer - you don’t need to refuse anyone, you don’t need to offend or upset anyone. The only one who will suffer is myself. But I can be patient. But one day it becomes unbearable that I haven’t done anything for myself in life. Or I did, but very little. I didn’t follow my dreams, I fulfilled someone else’s. I didn’t take care of myself, and now it’s already “late” (although here this word - “late” is generally inappropriate!).

And this feeling can be very depressing - it’s the “latest” thing. Someone thinks that it’s too late to go to a salon if you’ve never been there, it’s too late to start singing, dancing... And where is the happiness then? Even if everything goes “as it should” for you, this does not guarantee you happiness. If this is all, it’s not yours. If you didn’t dream about it, but did it only because you had to.

“No women are the same, not even similar. Each is a separate Universe! It is not true that everyone wants to be a wife and mother. Some people want to be hippies, some want to do business, some want to travel, and some want to stay home. And all this is normal! Strange, failed, offended by fate - these are the labels of ignorant people. I was a wife and mother for 23 years and all this time I felt bad. I was them through force. Now my son has grown up, my husband has left, and only at the age of 44 did I spread my wings. Everyone thinks I'm in love! I just feel good! I don't owe anyone anything at all! I walk down the street and involuntarily smile! This has never happened before. I wore decent, but “alien” clothes. And now I only do what I want and I don’t care about other people’s opinions.”

Sofia, 45 years old

“I really enjoyed singing. It was the most favorite thing in my life. But only when I turned 58 did I start doing this. And before that, I only did things that brought me little pleasure and that’s why I was unhappy.”

Nelya, 59 years old

“I tried to prove to my mother that I was not stupid and at least pretty. That's why I became a TV journalist. 13 years old. I found fame, but not happiness. Then I decided to find out what it’s like to get a big salary? I had a high income, but I spent most of my money on branded clothing to please my employer and meet the dress code. An absurd situation: you receive money from your employer and spend it to match the employer :) In general, financial solvency did not console me. I quit my job and started doing creative work. Today I create notebooks, organize master classes and exhibitions of masters. My husband immediately began to move up the career ladder, and his income increased. Today I know that dreams come true."

Lilia, 44 years old

“A simple story, like many others. My mother’s words, accidentally heard in childhood: “Your Natasha is smart, Anna is beautiful, but mine... neither this nor that.” And the young girl rushed to prove to her mother that she existed, that she could study, work, play sports... and she did so until she was 35 years old, until she realized that I was not living my own life. It’s good that I realized it in time, it’s not easy, I had to uproot something... and now not everything is smooth, it’s hard to learn at forty years to be a good wife, to give in, to trust, to inspire... To be a good mother, because you don’t know how, you only know how not necessary. But I am completely happy - my wife is 2 years old and my daughter is 9 months old. Thank you to the Lord, I enlightened you and gave you gifts, kissed me on the crown.”

Elena, 42 years old

There were other things the women talked about. Many people said that it would be good to take care of your health while you have it. This became especially true for those over 50 years old. Still, at forty you still have health. Many wrote about the need to find your own path, and not earn money in generally accepted professions. Many have spoken about how destructive bad habits for women – smoking, alcohol.

There was one more category that we did not initially take into account in the survey. And there were many stories and regrets on this topic. When we are over 40, our parents are over 60-70. And at this time they can leave the body or become very sick. So, many women shared that they regretted wasting time resenting their parents.

“It was very difficult at first. I didn’t know how to live further, I felt fully my orphanhood. I woke up and went to bed alone and defenseless. My family helped me adapt to the new life.

This acute feeling of orphanhood passed over time, but the memory of my loved ones and loving parents, thank God, is constantly present. They live with us in our conversations, individual remarks. My daughter and I don’t understand when they say that someone just sometimes remembers their relatives who have gone to other worlds. And we never forget about them! They are ALWAYS present with us, we don’t need to remember them. They are in our everyday life and holidays; they are in our words and thoughts; Yes, by and large, we are parts of them! Those we love LIVE!!!

The only thing I grieve about is that I DIDN’T LOVE, I UNDERSAID, I LACKED CARE, TENDERNESS, ATTENTION during their lifetime. This is my burden now that is darkening my life.

Girls, remember! In due time you will also be orphaned, just like me! WHAT and WHO will you be left with then?! Will your heart bleed and suffer from the feeling of your own guilt for your callous, cold, inattentive attitude towards those who gave you life? Will anyone be able to cry into their vest? Will there be those who need you nearby, who are the meaning of your life, your core, your anchor, your continuation, to whom will you pass the baton of love and sacrifice? Think about it. The future is created by your hands and hearts now!”

Larisa, 58 years old

“I met my father when I was 40 years old. I did this deliberately after one of the systemic constellations according to Bert Hellinger’s method, when I saw the connection between my failures in my personal life and my father’s family. He left my mother and me before I was born. Apart from his first and last name and the fact that he greatly offended my mother, I knew nothing else about him. And until the very moment I met him, I didn’t have any feelings associated with him at all; my consciousness lacked a whole layer of real ideas about the essence of the relationship between a man and a woman, unassimilated from childhood, about the essence of the relationship between a man and a woman when they are together, and, as it turned out, at the same time it seemed empty a matrix built in from birth about the sensation of natural male energies.

When I found my father’s phone number and called him for the first time, he harshly said that he did not have such a daughter, although he knew perfectly well about my existence for 40 years. He had another family and another daughter. A couple of days later he himself called me with feelings of acceptance and repentance. We began to communicate often by phone, living in different cities. He loved me and our conversations, sometimes even missing my voice. Six months later, I went to meet him in person, because we had no idea what each of us looked like. Dad was able to talk on the phone with my mom. I brought him my childhood photographs, we walked around the city and went to the zoo, where he proudly led me by the hand all the time, like a little daughter.

After some time, I felt that I had found myself, my internal matrix was gradually filled, I began to feel masculine and feminine energies, learning to distinguish, guide and use them. I realized that before, with a half-empty matrix, I could not clearly transmit my feminine energies into the world, which means I was not energetically among either women or men. And after some time my personal life started to get better."

Ariadna, 44 years old

I wish everyone happiness! I hope these stories can inspire you to make changes and live your life brighter! Regardless of how old you are now.

p.s. If you want, you can fill out the survey (if you are over 40 years old)

The desire to be slim and have an aesthetic appearance Almost every woman has it, and with age it increases more and more, becoming much stronger. The age of forty characterizes many women as those who have long had their own families, children, and work, which together creates a lot of responsibilities and troubles for her and therefore leaves very little time for herself. Excess weight occurs due to improper lifestyle, nutrition, physical activity, and also in connection with age-related changes in organism.

Problem excess weight It seems so large-scale only at first glance, but in reality it is not so.

What's special

A woman’s health and well-being primarily depends on the presence or absence of excess weight and lifestyle. When a woman reaches the age of forty, the metabolic process slows down in her body - this is main reason the appearance of excess weight at this age. See also: . As a result, the structure and outline of the body changes. During this period, the female body is also easily susceptible to various chronic diseases, which also affects it and the appearance of extra pounds. What to do about this and how to lose weight for a woman at 42 years old? In order to lose weight, you should consume more protein and calcium, and you should give up fat to a greater extent to rid yourself of extra pounds.

Today, there are a huge number of diets to somehow change your appearance and improve your health, but some of them can harm the body and not all of the proposed diets provide benefits and some results for losing weight. It must be remembered that it is impossible to completely abstain from consuming fats - this will lead to disruption of the processes of synthesis of the genital organs, which regulate the functions female body. As a result, a woman may experience menopause because of this.

How to effectively become slimmer

Losing weight, which is not harmful and gives good results, is never done without physical effort. When making a decision to lose weight, you must clearly understand that you will have to work hard, and not just for one week, for this. By changing something in ourselves, we change our lives and the main thing is not to be afraid to do it. Also, losing excess weight involves changing what needs to be done, and this applies not only to nutrition and physical activity on the body, but also to following rules such as:

You need to drink at least 1.5 - 2 liters of water per day. Sometimes you can drink boiled water, but not tea or juice in such quantities. This is necessary so that the body does not need fluid and is constantly cleansed. Change your usual diet and add more fruits, vegetables, and berries to it. Drink fresh juices every morning and evening. If you want to eat often, then make salads and broths for snacks. You should avoid flour products with the exception of black bread, but do not eat it too often.

Stick to it healthy regime sleep. You need to sleep at least 7-8 hours a day. The length of sleep time affects the metabolism in a woman’s body. Try to move more, play sports, plan various ways entertainment and lead an active lifestyle so that the blood does not freeze in the body and the body muscles tense. In this way, the process of burning excess fat will take place. A few hours before bedtime, it is advisable not to eat and if you feel hungry, you can drink a little yogurt or kefir. It is worth excluding semi-finished products and substitutes from your diet for the benefit of your health and getting rid of body fat. Once a month, drink only water throughout the day. This weight loss tip helps remove toxins from the body through calla lilies.

Pay attention to the calorie content of the products you buy and get into the habit of counting calories when you pick up the product so that your weight loss efforts are not in vain. Food must provide some benefit to the body. Do it often physical exercise alternating it with new exercises without a break for at least 15 minutes twice a day, and also make sports your new hobby, for example, this would be good way diversify your weekend. Look - . Remember that fat appears with little mobility, and sports, on the contrary, helps to get rid of it.

Useful vitamins

When choosing a method of losing weight, it is important to be sure that there are no negative consequences for the body, and it would not be entirely appropriate to start using creams or tablets at the risk of your own health. Everyone probably knows that vitamins are beneficial, but not many women know exactly what beneficial function a vitamin performs, and most likely it will be very useful to know.

• C- promotes the burning of excess fat in the human body.
• D- prevents the feeling of hunger for a long period of time.
• B2 - takes an active part in the metabolic processes of the body and regulates their work.
• B3- is responsible for the distribution of sugar in the blood and reduces appetite.
• B4 - responsible for fat metabolism in the body.
• B5 - works during any processes in the body and removes energy from fat cells.
• B6 - controls metabolism and is one of the elements in the production of thyroid hormones.
• B8 - burns excess weight.
• B12 - prolongs a person’s ability to be constantly active.

Create a plan to improve yourself

First, determine how many kilograms you want to lose to lose weight. It is advisable to write this down. You can use an electronic calculator, which, depending on the parameters of age, weight and level of mobility, will determine how many calories you should lose, for example, in a week so as not to get too lazy and overdo it. Any diet involves calculating how much space a calorie occupies in a product and its total amount in products.

Secondly, here is an important tip for eating for the whole day - eat smaller portions, while making a list of what you eat often, rarely and what you have given up. Determine what you should do throughout the whole day: have time to do, what to eat, at what time and when to do a little body exercise, what portion of food will be the norm for one meal, feeling hungry, how you will act, and so on.

2016-10-09

Olga Zhirova

Comments: 17 .

Megan92 () 2 weeks ago

Recently I firmly decided to lose weight... I went on the Internet, and there is so much here, my eyes are wide open!! Now I don’t know what to do, where to start.. That’s why I’m turning to you! How did you lose weight? WHAT REALLY HELPED?? I would really like to cope with excess weight on my own, without nutritionists and doctors..

Daria () 2 weeks ago

Well, I don’t know, as for me, most diets are bullshit, they just torture yourself. No matter how much I tried, nothing helped. The only thing that helped me lose about 7 kg was X-Slim. I found out about him by chance, from this article. I know many girls who also lost weight.

P.S. Only I’m from the city and couldn’t find it on sale here, so I ordered it online.

Megan92 () 13 days ago

Daria () 12 days ago

megan92, it’s also indicated in the article) I’ll duplicate it just in case - X-Slim official website

Rita 10 days ago

Isn't this a scam? Why do they sell on the Internet?

Yulek26 (Tver) 10 days ago

Rita, it’s like you fell from the moon. Pharmacies are grabbers and even want to make money from it! And what kind of scam can there be if payment is made after receipt and one package can be received for free? For example, I ordered this X-Slim once - the courier brought it to me, I checked everything, looked at it and only then paid. At the post office it’s the same, there is also payment upon receipt. And now everything is sold on the Internet - from clothes and shoes to equipment and furniture.

Rita 10 days ago

I apologize, I didn’t notice the information about cash on delivery at first. Then everything is fine if payment is made upon receipt.

Elena (SPB) 8 days ago

I read the reviews and realized that I had to take it) I’ll go place an order.

Dima () A week ago

I ordered it too. They promised to deliver within a week (), so let's wait

Every seven years, counting from the moment of birth, our lives change dramatically. Astrologers explain these changes by the fatal influence of the mysterious planet Saturn. Psychologists natural personality development. Choose which theory you like best. All seven-year cycles end with “fateful years”: 7, 14, 21, 28, 35, 42, 49 and so on.

At seven and fourteen years old, your parents help you overcome difficulties. And from the age of twenty-one, you take your destiny under personal control and it depends only on you how you spend the next life cycle. Few people succeed in passing the transition from one cycle to another unnoticed and painlessly, but it can be softened, and it is necessary to lay a strong foundation for a successful next period.

21-27 years old: “It’s time to live your life and do your own thing”

At 21, you are no longer a teenager, but... adult woman. Stop rushing about, choosing, protesting and demonstrating. The time for trial and error is over. At twenty-one, many girls get married, or decide to live with a friend separately from their family, or realize that they don’t want to think about a family yet.

If you still haven’t found your path in life, Saturn will mercilessly push you towards it. My friend’s daughter, while studying at the university, recklessly walked with the boys and did nothing, in her last year she got into a car accident, broke her leg, underwent two operations, took up books in the hospital, defended her diploma brilliantly and now works in an insurance company and is about to leave marry a colleague. Australian singer Kylie Minogue, at twenty-one, experienced a whirlwind romance with handsome and drug addict Michael Hutchins, lead singer of the rock band INXS. Passion turned the ordinary, pretty starlet of soap operas into a sexual siren; she began to sing, and very well, out of violent emotions. But then Michael became interested in fashion model Helena Christensen. Kylie could continue to live with love alone, try to keep him, but she made her choice in favor of a career. A few years later she ex-lover committed suicide by pumping himself up with a mixture of antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs and leaving behind another girlfriend with their common one-and-a-half-year-old child. And by the age of thirty, Kylie had become a world celebrity.

On your 21st birthday, think about what you really want and do it. The next seven years of your life will depend on whether you decide to do it your own way or listen to someone again. Don’t be afraid of making the wrong choice; if you do something stupid, life won’t end there, you will gain experience that will still serve you well. And if you don’t do anything, then everything in your life will come seven years later.

28 years old-34 years old: “Take what you want and pay for it”

At 28 years old, you must understand: you must be responsible for all the consequences of your own actions. For those who are slow to think, Saturn teaches very cruel lessons. A young woman with two children leaves a good, flexible husband for another man, because she is sure she needs love, but she has never experienced it in her marriage. Six months later she loses her job, and two weeks later her father dies of a stroke. A few months later, she breaks up with her friend, and then takes care of her seriously ill daughter. We can say that this is all a chain of tragic coincidences. But as the saying goes Eastern wisdom, “every accident has its cause.” You can’t leave your husband without upsetting your parents’ divorce; You can’t do what you love while under constant stress; frivolous lovers, as a rule, are bad husbands and unfit fathers, and our children depend on our mood, like flowers on the sun. If you don’t learn the first cruel lesson, it will be followed by a second, a third, and you will enter a “crazy” or, as psychologists say, “turbulent” seven years dedicated to correcting mistakes.

Make time work for you

At the age of 28, sometimes it seems that life is going wrong somehow and you need to change it: get pregnant without your husband’s consent, change jobs, tell your faithful and beloved friend that she is a bore. So don't do this. At 28, you need to create and gain, not lose, and it doesn’t matter what we’re talking about: friends or marriage. Find someone with whom you can talk about everything, read a mountain of books on psychology and think more about what you hear and read. Otherwise, some rash act will lead to a whole chain of misfortunes.

35 years-41 years: “It’s time for perfection, harmony and balance”

But the beginning can be difficult. Tom Cruise announced to his wife Nicole Kidman that he intends to divorce her on her 35th birthday. A month later, she had a miscarriage and locked herself in her house for a long time to figure out how to move on. And although Nicole was left alone in the end, she became wonderfully prettier and received an Oscar.

And my friend Marina was woken up by her husband early on Saturday morning and said that he had met his first youthful love, everything stirred up in his soul and now he wants to live alone and figure out what to do next. Marina was only concerned with her daughter and the house, and with the departure of her husband, she was left without any means of subsistence. The husband promised to give money for the household. But what if they get divorced? What then to live on? And what did she herself achieve by mid-life? A cruel blow showed her: honey, it’s boring to talk to you, you don’t have a profession, but you have gained 20 kilograms of excess weight, you turned a blind eye to changes in your husband’s behavior and lived in a world of illusions. Marina got a job as a saleswoman in a store and enrolled in accounting courses. Her husband returned to her six months later, she lost weight and began to be interested in something else other than raising children.

Make time work for you

If you don't have children at 35, it's time to give birth. If you don't have a profession, it's time to study. If you've never been able to drive a car, get a license. She who despised the kitchen should study cooking. A housewife should consider working a few hours a week. You need to restore your balance in life, otherwise you will spend all subsequent years on the side of the scale that has dropped down.

42 years old - 48 years old: “It’s time for big changes”

These are the wrinkles that you can’t help but notice, and no one will call you “girl” anymore, even looking from your back. You came to the gynecologist to complain about cycle irregularities, and she, rolling her eyes to the ceiling, said in a boring voice: “Haven’t you thought about the approach of menopause?” If you failed to take care of life balance seven years ago, you are afraid of the approaching old age. You put on a miniskirt that literally screams: “Look, I'm not old yet! I’m still going somewhere!” A woman wants to change her previous partner for young lover. Sometimes interest in yourself drops, the world dims and depression begins. Astrologers say: At the end of the sixth seventh year, Saturn does not push us onto the right path and does not punish us for rashness; he asks us the question: “Are you ready to come to terms with old age?”

Make time work for you

You are going through a second teenage crisis, only you are leaving not your childhood, but your youth, and there are no caring parents around to support you. Now is the time to act and change yourself and your life. Learn to play the piano, buy yourself a good camera and shoot sunsets, get a promotion. You can have a baby. Should I divorce my husband? Show wisdom and tolerance, it’s not easy for him either. And if you both successfully overcome the barrier of forty years, a new upsurge of feelings awaits you. If you don't have a husband, find a lover. You must open the door to a new living space, where you will live in all subsequent years, not only as a mother and not just as a pretty woman, but also as a wise, mature person.

49 years old: “I’m different now”

If you haven’t had time to change, then you will face a severe and painful menopause, with depression, outbursts of uncontrolled aggressiveness and hot flashes. The lessons of fate on the transition to the 50th anniversary are harsh: adult children live their own lives, they don’t ask to look after their grandchildren and don’t need advice, at work everywhere they are young and active, illnesses have crippled them, and it seems that only suffering and loneliness lie ahead.

Make time work for you

Regrets about the past are a completely natural feeling for turning 50; there is no need to be afraid of it. Your sadness will be dispelled not by vigorous activity, but by enjoying life. Pamper yourself with all the pleasures available to your budget: let it be French perfume, Italian shoes, Marinina’s latest detective story, a trip to Tallinn, Prague or Cesis. Get rid of those friends who say that only crazy people your age go for a Thai massage and waste money on travel. Communicate with those who are able to understand and approve new facets of your nature. And you will see that life is still excitingly interesting and will always be so.