Instructions

As one famous cartoon sang, “It’s no secret that friends don’t grow in gardens.” Indeed, by constantly sitting at home or traveling only on the work-home-TV route, you will not make friends. Starting new ones and maintaining them is an art that requires some effort and attention. And in order to somehow get the ball rolling, do a simple exercise first: take a large sheet of paper, a pencil and write down all your existing contacts. And then analyze them.

Even the most withdrawn person has at least some kind of social circle: colleagues, relatives, acquaintances, etc. Take a close look at your connections and determine what quality they are and in what area you lack contacts. Do you not have enough friends for informal communication, do you need useful contacts for your career or business, are there problems with personal life– your diagram will clearly show you which way to move.

Having determined what kind of new acquaintances you need, proceed to creating them. Most main principle making friends is that you should look for them among like-minded people. No the best way make new acquaintances than collaboration over the common cause. If you have a hobby, try to find a club or society related to it. Surely among its participants you will find many interesting people.

Start attending social events that interest you and are close to you. Concerts, performances, creative meetings, sports competitions, collective volunteer community service. The main thing is that this activity is interesting to you in itself. Then people doing the same things will be pleasant and interesting to you. And you will probably have many common topics of conversation.

If you are looking to make connections in your professional field, begin to take an active interest in its status and development. Attend business meetings and conferences, participate in round tables, enter into correspondence with the authors of ideas or professional works that interest you. When attending any business group event, try to get to know and remember as many of its participants as possible. Exchange opinions and short phrases with them, ask for business cards with contact information and offer yours.

If you don't know how to start communicating with stranger, try to start by simply greeting him and exchanging non-binding remarks. Ask him professional opinion on some issue, say something nice. Usually, the majority of people are willing to make contact. Most importantly, remember that any task is especially difficult only the first time. Thus, once you overcome your shyness and start communicating, you will very quickly become convinced that there is nothing particularly difficult in this, and a large number of attempts will help you develop the most suitable tactics for making acquaintances for you.

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If you are an active and ambitious person, the lack of interesting people in your social circle can quickly get boring. Such people will help you maintain your passion for life and strive to do something remarkable. It's not that difficult to meet them.

Instructions

First of all, it is necessary to understand that each person is individual. The people you communicate with, like you, have their own interests, ambitions, goals in life, etc. Therefore, you should not expect that everyone you talk to will be interesting to you. However, you won’t need this, since your social circle will be negligible compared to the total number of people you can meet. Thus, the chances of meeting really interesting people are very high. There may be several dozen or even hundreds of such people.

The problem of finding interesting people most often lies within ourselves. If you are a very active person and have certain plans and goals in life that you would like to achieve, your worries can easily consume you. Being so caught up in your problems can make you blind to your surroundings. Interesting people in fact, there are a lot of them, and they are also among those who are close to you. Stop thinking only about yourself, do not become overly focused on your own affairs. Immersion in yourself and your problems is one of the main obstacles that can prevent you from meeting interesting people.

Learn to talk to people, listen to them carefully. Try not to bring your problems into a conversation with them and do not turn the conversation into a monologue. Don't try to be interesting and impress. This way, you will not only miss the opportunity to learn the interesting sides of your interlocutor, but also push him away from you. Trying to talk more about yourself and your ambitions will lead to people thinking less about you. If you are looking for interesting people, be interested in communication, be willing to listen.

You can greatly increase your chance of meeting interesting people if you don't limit yourself to only those who share your interests. This is especially important if you are engaged in a narrow area of ​​activity or, for example, are a representative of a specific subculture. In addition, communicating with those who do not share your views can give you much more new and interesting things than with those who only repeat all the time what you already know.

If you don't know where you can meet interesting people, just attend social events, meet friends more often and make new acquaintances. There are a lot of interesting people, they are everywhere. The main thing is not to spend too much time on your personality, otherwise you will never find them.

It happens that among a woman’s acquaintances there is a man who is attractive to her, and sometimes it seems to her that this interest is mutual. However, for some reason, he does not take the initiative. A woman cannot understand what a man really thinks, while remaining a mystery, he arouses even more interest in her. Meanwhile, in most cases, getting to know the person you like better is not so difficult.

Instructions

Sometimes a man wants to ask a girl out on a date, but is not confident in himself and is afraid of rejection. In order to gain confidence, he must feel that he will receive a positive response. Sometimes a woman thinks that she is showing her feelings quite clearly, but a man may imagine the situation completely differently.

It is generally accepted that the first step towards closer acquaintance should be made by a man. However, there are women who take the initiative themselves and easily achieve positive results. Although not everyone can decide to do this, because there is a danger of getting into an awkward position. It is best if the lady creates a favorable atmosphere so that the man decides to take the initiative.

According to psychologists, people often unconsciously send so-called “courtship signals” to members of the opposite sex. Men, as a rule, respond to such signals by taking the initiative in relationships with women who start a conversation with them, smile, and cast meaningful glances. At the same time, it is not at all necessary on the neck of your chosen one. If he is interested in getting to know each other better, he will take the first step himself.

When meeting the object of your affection, first of all, you need to make a favorable impression on him. To do this, you can smile kindly, look into his eyes, say something pleasant - for example, admire his intelligence, strength, knowledge and skills.

Next time, it's worth having a longer conversation, during which you can tell a little about yourself and try to find out what his interests are. At the same time, it is worth considering whether a man continues to evoke sympathy after he has revealed Additional information About Me. You should also pay attention to his reaction: if he is positive, you can continue to take steps towards closer acquaintance, if he is neutral or - what good! – negative – it’s better to give up trying.

If communication takes place on a friendly level and the man clearly shows interest, the girl should tell him that she is always happy to communicate with him. If a man is really interested and ready to start serious relationship, he will ask the girl out on a date or at least ask her for her phone number. If this does not happen, it is better to accept the fact that it is unlikely that you will be able to get to know him better.

The advantage of such communication is that the man will not think that the woman is imposing herself on him, and the lady, in turn, will not feel rejected if the chosen one has not responded to her “signals.”

The initiative shown by a woman is her inherent femininity, coquetry, friendliness, sense of humor and ability to communicate. These qualities will sooner or later find a response in the heart worthy man, and he will definitely take the first step towards a closer acquaintance.

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Looking for a job, especially in a city where you don’t know anyone, is not the easiest task. But this does not mean that taking a worthy workplace there is no destiny for a non-indigenous city dweller. A couple of acquaintances makes your dream job many times closer, and in order to acquire useful connections, it is enough to periodically visit the right places and communicate with the right people.

Instructions

Track events, seminars, meetings and conferences taking place in your city or nearby cities. If possible, try to attend, if not every “party,” then at least one or a seminar a month.

Immediately before the event, try to get to know the speakers and other guests of the meeting through social networks. Don’t impose on people; communicate strictly on topic, with personal questions like “How are you?” will have to go later.

Be sure to meet like-minded people when you meet. It doesn’t matter how long and closely you communicated by letter, direct dialogue is much more important. To people who know how to communicate competently real life, outside of social media, are taken more seriously.

Pay more attention to communicating with people who are somewhat famous in your industry. We are not talking about a frank search for benefits in communication; if you show yourself correctly, then the “right” person will lend you a helping hand.

Do not hesitate to demonstrate your knowledge and talk about your achievements in the right company. If your new acquaintances do not know that you are a certified programmer, then hardly any of them will think of offering you a vacant position in their corporation.

Maintaining contacts with useful people- a difficult but necessary part of the job for any career-oriented person. Usually there is not enough time for this. But if you force yourself to do it regularly, difficult situation your connections will help you out.

Do you think that useful acquaintances, both for you personally and for your work, can only be made at specialized exhibitions, conferences and presentations, where it is customary to communicate and exchange business cards? No, for this there is no need to sit for hours in smoky meeting rooms and conference rooms of hotels. If every person is regarded as potentially useful, then you can make acquaintances both in line for a cup of coffee and in the gym.

Some acquaintances will be fleeting, but others will bring you a lot of benefit. The ability to meet, and most importantly, maintain relationships with people is the key to success. After all, it is from your friends that you can learn about new opportunities for developing your career. “People consider communicating with people and finding new contacts as work,” says Karin Susman, career development specialist. “You need to understand that the search for useful acquaintances happens all the time, everywhere and always.” Back in Texas, recruiter Becky Gates became a member of the local book society. A recommendation from one of the club members helped her get a job at a charity organization. “In a conversation, I mentioned that I would like to work in a non-profit organization,” says 55-year-old Becky Gates. “The woman knew the CEO of the local Scout Association and it turned out they had a vacancy.”

“Working on contacts” really takes time. But even if you’re super busy, you can find a couple of minutes a day to strengthen connections. Tom Ayers, director of a communications company, spends about five minutes a day calling or texting some of the contacts in his database of about 900 people. There are coordinates there former colleagues, business partners and other useful friends. Tom thinks that best time for correspondence and “support” calls - morning. Sometimes he finds time between meetings or calls and writes in the evenings from home. “I don’t have much free time in my schedule, but I always find a minute to phone call" says Ayers. He believes that this approach has helped him more than once. When he was unemployed during the 2002 technology bust, new job he found, through a recommendation, a person with whom he had a casual but maintained acquaintance. Regular communication helps him stay informed latest news and trends, as well as look for employees for your company.

If you don't have time to communicate, ask yourself: Are you really so busy that you can't take a few minutes to make a few calls? Perhaps it's not so much a lack of time that's holding you back as it is uncertainty. Indeed, it takes courage to call a person who may very well not want to hear from you. But when one day it brings results, the anxiety goes away. Choose a time and try it. (WSJ, 11/21/2005, Polina Mikhaleva)

Why do you need to meet with classmates more often?

Even if you don't like your former classmates, maintaining old connections is very useful. This allows you to receive inside information, measure personal success and find new business contacts.

Anatoly Zhuravlev, CEO of the architectural and construction company Rosenfield Holdings, graduated from the Faculty of Economics of Moscow State University. He says that meetings held under the auspices of the alumni club provide an opportunity to “learn a lot of new and useful things.” “For example, when “your” officials who supervise business speak, you learn about some important plans of the government before your competitors,” Zhuravlev rejoices. Two years ago, at one of these meetings with the participation of a graduate of the Faculty of Economics - then still a State Duma deputy - Mikhail Zadornov, the draft Housing Code was discussed, and Zhuravlev drew the attention of his colleague to the fact that the legislation in this area does not correspond to the market situation, when the number of registered people affects the volumes provided living space upon resettlement. After that, he says, amendments were introduced to the legislation to repeal this provision - “I think, not without the influence of that conversation.”

Joint events useful for establishing business contacts between former classmates, since “systematic meetings generate trust” and allow timely assistance to each other. “Very often people ask me to evaluate the return on investment,” says Zhuravlev, adding that recently in this way he was able to warn his fellow graduate against a risky deal to purchase one capital property, thereby saving him almost $1 million.

However, experts note that the potential for networking offered by alumni associations is almost untapped in Russia. The scientific director of the Higher School of Economics, Evgeny Yasin, who is also a member of the alumni club of the Moscow State University Faculty of Economics, notes that in their ideal form such clubs exist at Harvard, where graduates, holding high positions in large corporations, not only help their colleagues, but also contribute “serious sponsorship contributions” ensure “fame and prosperity” of the university. And although the club movement in Russia is still poorly developed, its significance lies elsewhere - in the possibility of intellectual communication between people of the same circle, he says.

However, you should not perceive alumni associations as a kind of social elevator. “The demand for our graduates in power cannot be explained by corporate solidarity and the manifestation of student fraternity,” says Anatoly Grebenshchikov, deputy dean of the Faculty of Law at St. Petersburg University, from which Russian President Vladimir Putin and First Deputy Chairman of the Russian Government Dmitry Medvedev, who heads the faculty’s alumni association, graduated. “If we look at each of the graduates, we will see a bright, extraordinary personality who showed himself long before taking public positions,” says Grebenshchikov. According to him, the opportunity to make a bright career in the civil service for graduates of the faculty has always been facilitated by a creative atmosphere, in which the student was formed as a person, and then “manifested under favorable circumstances.”

Measuring jacket

Alumni from other universities are not afraid to recognize the value of networking with fellow alumni. The head of the Russian representative office of HSBC Private Banking, Kirill Vishnevsky, one of the members of the MGIMO club, which was created two years ago and today unites one and a half thousand graduates of this university, evaluates the role of his community “very highly”: “Firstly, I was able to meet with friends, contact with whom has been severed since the day of graduation, and, secondly, to get closer to them professionally.”

Vishnevsky says that during a recent acquaintance with the leading lawyer of the law firm CWS Caneron McKenna, it was discovered that he was also a graduate of MGIMO, as a result of joint visits to club events and already informal communication influenced the fact that their business relationship became more “trusting”.

Another member of this club, chief specialist of the Department of Structural Reform of the Ministry of Transport Yulia Osadchaya, says that such meetings contribute to “a feeling of being in a career”: “When you see what heights your colleagues have reached, and the range of industries in which they occupy leading positions is colossal, it gives you strength, the desire to move on, to make fundamental decisions in your own professional life.”

A start to life

However, not all clubs are limited to work to unite graduates. They can help newly graduated people find employment. The MGIMO Alumni Association, which emerged 14 years ago, existed until April 2004 as an organization to “maintain friendly relations between graduates” of the university. However, after studying the experience of their Western colleagues, the club’s management also decided to look for jobs for their players. “Currently, work in this direction is carried out mainly through university graduates, HR managers of various companies, who periodically look for personnel among “their own,” says Andrei Stelmakh, director of the association. According to him, today 3,070 people (potential job seekers) are registered in the organization’s database, and those who find work with the help of the community earn an average of at least $1,000 as hired managers 1.5 years after graduation.

However, the newly graduated holders of a diploma from this institute themselves are skeptical about the possibilities of the alumni association: “If a person at the end of the institute does not have any certainty regarding the place of future work, then in such a situation, of course, all means are good. You can buy the newspaper “From Hand to Hand”, you can post advertisements at business centers, you can contact the association. I don’t know of any cases of graduates being employed by this organization,” says Elena Pershutkina, who recently graduated from MGIMO and already heads her own PR agency.

Personnel reserve

Companies that provide professional employment are a little less categorical towards this type of community. “Due to the growth of companies, the shortage of personnel is growing, and in order to fill vacancies, employers have to develop their own personnel and develop internship programs,” notes Elena Klekovkina, head of the marketing department of the Ankor company. - To attract young specialists, our company, like direct employers, also uses alumni clubs. But it should be kept in mind that since recent graduates are not middle and senior managers, they are not “hunted”, and in order to please the employer, they must show their own activity.” For our part, by informing graduates about certain vacancies through the websites of their clubs, we also expect them to actively participate in the realization of their career ambitions, adds Klekovkina.

And the managing partner of Suvorova & Partners Executive Search, Olga Suvorova, notes that the interaction of recruiting agencies and clubs is hampered by the “lack of proven schemes for such cooperation.” According to her, the company tried to establish cooperation with a number of clubs, but faced two problems. “Not all databases of these communities contain information about candidates who graduated from a university, say, five or even 10 years ago, while these are the people who are in greater demand on the market,” she says. And another important problem is that we are ready to pay for some club services, for example, for using a database, but clubs often have no financial policy at all, adds Suvorova.

Not all bad habits useless. Social media addiction the right approach can significantly help a business. The Secret asked entrepreneurs and experts about how to make Facebook and other social networks work for you.

Remember your online portrait

You need to be careful about your online image. special attention. Founder and CEO of the startup SoFits.Me Natalia Kotlyarevskaya notes: the impression of a person on social networks is stronger than the first superficial acquaintance; his beliefs and values, often quite personal, are immediately reflected here. “10 minutes of studying a profile on any social network is enough to learn more than after an hour of offline communication,” she emphasizes.

It wouldn’t hurt to clearly define what is personal and what is corporate. “Work with your profile privacy settings if your account has been created for a long time and you are not sure that it has never contained content that compromises you. If it is important to synchronize your personal account with your corporate account, delete unnecessary photos,” advises Andrey Chernogorov, CEO of the Cognitive Technologies group of companies.

There is no point in pretending to be someone else. Kotlyarevskaya is sure: it is always better to remain yourself on social networks, even if you are promoting your business through them - when you meet in person, inconsistencies in behavior and manners will definitely come to light. To learn to perceive your online portrait as a lifelong tattoo, you can watch a lecture by one of the founders of Harvard Business School, Juan Enriquez.

Stop being shy

“Add as friends people whom you will be glad to see among your clients and with whom you would like to continue communicating in real life“,” says Leonid Bugaev, creative director of Nordic Agency AB and author of the book “Mobile Networking”. The founder of the cargo transportation service “Everyone is Lucky,” Ivan Plastun, also recommends subscribing to all opinion leaders and representatives of the media relevant to your business. “Initially, you can simply go by the method of blindly adding as a friend and start communicating with those who responded,” notes Plastun. - The larger this snowball of profile contacts becomes, the easier it will be for you to meet people halfway in the future. At first, it’s hard for many to break their inner constraint, but after the first two or three hundred friends it becomes much easier.”

You can also make useful connections through your acquaintances, says Alexandra Vyal, founder of the Barcelona startup: “Just ask to be introduced to you.” to the right person. The best way to do this is through a chat that your mutual friend will create and invite both of them to: in it he will talk about you and at a certain moment the friend will simply leave the chat and you can continue the conversation with the necessary person in person.” Another good way make new acquaintances online - transfer them there from offline, advises Andrei Chernogorov. “Having met an interesting professional at a conference, you shouldn’t limit yourself to just one thing online: “Hi, it was nice to meet you!” It’s better to say something less general: “Hello! A very interesting report on the new Yandex.Direct algorithm,” he advises.

Remind yourself

Valuable connections need to be maintained. Consider communication with important people on social networks as part of your work, and not as entertainment, Alexandra Vyal urges. The longer you remain silent, the faster you lose contact: there is a lot of information on the Internet, there are even more people, and quite quickly your new online friends will forget who you are. Stay in touch and visible, unobtrusively, but with sufficient consistency, remind yourself of yourself, advises Alexandra. If you find something on a topic close to your interlocutor, share, discuss, demonstrate interest.

It’s not worth pestering businessmen on the Internet with nonsense. “You need to understand that most entrepreneurs are busy people who value their time. In order for them to show interest in communication, you need to ask them for advice or come up with some interesting proposal. Communication for the sake of communication here will not work as effectively as a specific question on the merits,” says Vladimir Batishchev, founder of the Perevezi.rf carrier search service. - For example, competitors contacted us through Facebook and asked for advice on doing business. For our part, we shared our experience. The more entrepreneurs communicate with each other, the more joint ideas and projects they have.”

Understand your social circles

An entrepreneur needs to delimit his social circles on the Internet, Leonid Bugaev is sure. Contacts should be divided into three groups: family and friends, friends and acquaintances, colleagues and clients who generate income. A separate category is potential customers and partners. Relationships with them need to be taken offline as soon as possible. “Stay in touch with those who bring you dividends: a contract, an order, helps you reach the right people,” Bugaev emphasizes. He encourages the rest to ruthlessly filter. Analysis of profiles on social networks will help when distributing into groups. “It will give you a deeper understanding of a person, his hobbies and characteristic points of business interest than a selection of press articles with notes where he is mentioned,” says Andrei Chernogorov.

Become a source of content and share successes

To increase popularity and expand the circle of contacts, AMI business school teacher Artyom Menumerov recommends that entrepreneurs turn network accounts into a source of content, useful topics who is interested in their business. The creator of the clothing brand, Victoria Iribaeva, believes that it is easier to outsource this work and develop the right content strategy for social networks in advance with specialists.

You can also talk on social networks about the company’s activities and its achievements. You just need to make sure that this information is interesting to the market, notes Andrey Chernogorov. He recommends taking an example from the founder of the social network for doctors “Doctor at Work” Stanislav Sazhin, who in his accounts talks about the company’s latest successes, new revenue records or, for example, market development in India. But even here you need to be careful. Once you start writing about your company, never stop. Otherwise, from the outside it will seem that your business is dead. If you don’t have enough time for regular texts, you can also entrust them to a PR specialist or SMM specialist.

If you have no work experience, or you decide to change your field of activity, or have not worked for a long time due to various reasons, you probably feel like you have absolutely nothing to interest a potential employer. You feel like an impostor who will certainly be exposed and politely rejected.

Do not despair. There are several simple and working ways to attract the attention of the people you need, even if you have absolutely nothing to brag about.

Probe the soil

Communication is a two-way thing. Much depends not so much on your self-presentation, but on your desire to get to know your interlocutor as best as possible.

Meeting a potential employer is like a first date: on it you are just getting to know each other.

If it turns out that you are not suitable for each other at all, well, it’s good that you found out quickly. You can immediately start looking for someone more suitable.

Ask questions instead of paraphrasing your own. Think in advance about what is important to you and what is unacceptable in your future job. Be interested in the details of projects and company policies. It will feel awkward at first, but it will go away quickly.

Show genuine interest

Don't ask questions that can be answered with "yes," "no," or "I've been working for this company for three years." It's not data you need. You want a conversation that will be remembered.

Don't forget that every person, even the highest rank, wants to be heard and understood. The trouble is that in most cases we listen to our interlocutor in order to respond and say what we think. Suppress this desire and just listen.

When answering, repeat what you heard in other words and ask a new question.

From the moment you approach your interlocutor, he expects you to begin presenting yourself. When he sees that you are listening to him without trying to draw attention to himself, he will gratefully tell you everything you want.

Think about what you can offer your interlocutor

Even if you've never worked, you have something to offer. The main thing your future manager wants to know about you is how you can be useful. Therefore, do not start communicating with a potential employer by asking about salary and working conditions.

If he sees you as a worthy candidate and wants to get you on his team, you can probably negotiate acceptable terms. But first, think about what you can give to your employer.

Take your time and don't force yourself

If you succeed with the person you are interested in, do not start planning your further relationship and do not offer to meet tomorrow morning to continue the conversation. All that is required of you is to please here and now. This will work to your advantage in the future.

Don't show your strengths and weaknesses right away

In an effort to be liked, you don’t need to demonstrate all your advantages at once. Your interlocutor will mentally compare himself with you, and he will not be very pleased to lose in this comparison.

It’s also not worth rushing to the other extreme and demonstrating self-doubt. Just don’t hide the fact that you would like to improve your skills and learn something new.

By admitting your weaknesses, you give your opponent the right to his own imperfections. You will both relax and your conversation will become more casual.

Even if you don't have the most impressive resume, don't despair. Your desire to work and grow is much more important.

Unfortunately, from childhood we are not taught how to make useful contacts, maintain existing contacts, and influence other people. We learn all this intuitively, adopting experience, while making a lot of mistakes. At the end we get a sad picture. Such self-education is given to a few; they become presidents, successful leaders, famous personalities; the rest give up developing this skill and become disillusioned with it.

We are looking at successful people with envy and admiration, not realizing that each of us is capable of achieving the same recognition. In this article we will tell you about 5 important tips that will tell you how to make useful contacts.

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• Persuasion methods are effective leadership tools

Tip 1. Make useful contacts with people who like you e are similar

Psychologists say that we intuitively strive to choose people who are similar to ourselves in our environment. We seem to be drawn to clients and colleagues who are friendly and like us. It’s easier to communicate with similar people; we quickly come to agreement on many issues. Businessmen have a different opinion on this matter. The most complex problems can be solved by a team consisting of people who are different from each other. The strengths and weaknesses of each compensate each other, and the team works as a single organism. Strive for relationships that highlight the differences between you and other people. You can learn more from such communication. At first, this will cause discomfort and tension. However, this is how you can look at familiar things differently and you will have new ideas.

Tip 2: Watch the person, not the job title

A little test. Remember your school or college friends or acquaintances. Which of them has now achieved heights in their careers? Are you still in close contact with them? Can you call them at any time and ask for help or advice, just like during co-education? If yes - you happy man. Unfortunately, many will answer in the negative. Over time, we lose contacts with people, and when their help is needed, our past merits mean little, and we have to, on a general basis, break through bureaucratic obstacles in order to communicate with former classmates again. In the future, avoid such a mistake. Remember, in five or ten years it will be much more difficult for you to re-learn how to make useful connections with people who have taken important positions. Here's what you can do now. Make a list of successful and famous people who have not yet reached the peak of their careers. Ten names are enough to get started. Strive to maintain regular contact with them. Set a goal to meet with three people on your list every month.

• The art of negotiation: how to achieve a profitable result

Tip 3. Establish a relationship with the person first, and only thenuse this contact

Imagine the situation. This is your first time meeting a potential client. The client showers you with compliments, tells you how much they have heard about you and is eager to work with you and offers an attractive partnership. How will you react to this: will you trust the enthusiasm of the potential client or decide to test the waters and start interacting small? If you chose the second option, you are on the right track. The fact is that eight times out of ten, the customer's enthusiasm during the first meeting does not mean that he really intends to use your services or products. Remember, before entering into a relationship, whether it is business or personal communication, you need to build a foundation. When it comes to achieving serious results, there are no shortcuts. If a relationship starts too quickly, you run the risk of it breaking down just as quickly. If you are determined to build lasting contacts with someone, ask yourself three questions:

• Has enough time passed for a relationship based on trust to develop?
• Do we know enough information about each other for our relationship to develop in the right direction?
• What other information should we have about each other in order to move on to a serious relationship?

The ability to ask thoughtful questions is a valuable skill that can become yours secret weapon. If we draw an analogy between communication and cooking, then good questions are like salt; they eliminate blandness, enhance the taste and allow you to enjoy the process of conversation. Conscious and correctly formulated questions are important at the beginning of a conversation, so you will turn your attention to your interlocutor and be able to understand his desires, plans and intentions. By using good questions you show your opponent that you are closely following his train of thought. Don't be afraid to ask, plan and think ahead about your questions. Make it a rule, before each meeting with a client or partner, to prepare three open-ended, meaningful questions. This way you will build your reputation strategically thinking man who looks far ahead. For example, involve your opponent in making a decision, ask him: “Which solution do you think is best?”, or “What options for solving the problem do you consider preferable?”

Tip 5: Build relationships with people before you need them.

The ancient Romans, when they conquered new cities and countries, first of all built an extensive and high-quality network of roads. This was done deliberately in case of war or for trade. By analogy, create your own network of roads - relationships with other people. Do this in advance, without waiting for the “war” to take you by surprise.

You can read about other important tips on how to learn how to make useful acquaintances and connections, maintain existing contacts, and influence other people in the review of the book “SUPER Relationships. How to turn acquaintances into friends, clients into supporters, colleagues into like-minded people,” Andrew Sobel, Jerold Panas.