Every person knows. However, if you ask this question to different people, the answers will be completely different. Why is that? And is there a single true and correct definition of love - this is what I want to talk about.

The science

So what is love? Many minds of mankind have tried to define love throughout the history of earthly civilization. That is why it is worth considering this concept from different points of view. And I would like to start my analysis from the scientific sphere. What will be interesting to many is the fact that there is a special chemistry of love. Scientists have proven that when a person falls in love, his body produces such an amount of hormones that is akin to drug or alcohol intoxication. At the same time, the brain receives signals that indicate that the person is in a state of love. However, this is only one side of such a state, and considering love only as chemistry is simply a crime.

1. Love is a drug. Proof of this is a tomography of the head of a person in love. The same areas of the brain are activated in him as in a person who has used cocaine and is in a state of euphoria.
2. Love is a way of survival. Scientists have proven that human love is a slightly modified form of infatuation among animals. That is, it is easier for a person to find one partner for life, rather than constantly seeking new ones to satisfy his own sexual needs.
3. Love is blind. This statement also has scientific proof. A German researcher found that the areas of the brain responsible for rational decisions and negative emotions in a person in love simply turn off.
4. Love is an addiction. Scientists say that love should be treated in the same way as drug addiction: remove from the “patient’s” field of vision all factors that irritate him: photographs, gifts, any reminders of the object of desire.
5. Cure from love. Since when a person falls in love, the level of a hormone such as serotonin drops quite seriously, doctors suggest compensating for it with medication in order to be able to avoid crimes based on this feeling (as statistics show, their number has increased significantly recently). However, if you “overdo it” with this hormone, a person will not fall in love, but the attraction will remain, which is fraught with promiscuity.
6. Men love with their eyes. This statement is known to many people, but not everyone knows that it also has scientific proof. When guys fall in love, the zone responsible for the visual factor is activated. An interesting fact will be that in women the area responsible for memory becomes active: a woman remembers her partner’s behavior in order to later analyze it and draw conclusions: is it worth being with such a person further.

Dictionaries

So, as a small conclusion, I would like to give a few explanations of what love is. Scientific explanation, wording:

1. This is a strong heartfelt feeling, an emotional attraction.
2. Sexual attraction, desire.
3. Strong positive emotions.
4. Mental closeness, tender attitude.

But in general we can say that love with scientific point vision is pure chemistry.

Art

It will also be interesting that you can watch love. Photos, paintings - they perfectly illustrate this feeling. However, this is not enough for art. Many writers have also thought about what love is. It is sung in poetry, songs, and always appears on the pages of prose stories and novels. Various ones have already become so famous that people sometimes don’t even know who said it or what work they were taken from.

1. Boris Pasternak: "Love is a high disease."
2. Stendhal, “On Love”: “Love is like a fever, it can appear and fade away without the slightest sense of human will.”
3. Haruki Murakami, “Kafka on the Beach”: “Every person who falls in love is in search of something that he lacks.”
4. “The Physiology of Marriage” by Honore de Balzac: “True affection is blind. You should not judge the people you love.”
5. Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream: "That's why Cupids are portrayed as blind, because the lover looks not with his eyes, but with his heart."
6. Fyodor Dostoevsky, “The Brothers Karamazov”: “What is hell? Regret that one cannot love even more.”

And a huge number of such statements can be cited. As for the nuances, they will all be different, but they will still have a single line.

Philosophers: Erich Fromm

Philosophers also have their own works on this topic. They talked a lot about love, presenting information from a variety of points of view. Now I would like to pay attention to Erich Fromm and his work “The Art of Loving.” What interesting conclusions did this philosopher make in his work? So, in his opinion, love is not just a sentimental feeling that can arise in a person. This is not enough, it is not enough. In order for love to develop, the person himself must develop and grow morally. The first step that everyone must take is to realize that love is an art, akin to the art of living. And in order to understand love in its entirety, every person must perceive it as something more than a given. The philosopher also says that in addition to love, there is some other form of relationship, symbiotic unity. There are two types:

1. Passive is to some extent masochism, when a person subordinates himself to the will of another and becomes an integral part of him. In this case, he loses his individuality.
2. Active is sadism, when one person subjugates the will of another person, making him an integral part of himself.

However, mature love is the opposite of these forms of relationships. This is the unification of two people while maintaining their personality, individuality, and integrity. According to Erich Fromm, love is a kind of force that breaks down walls, helping a person to reunite with another person. True mature love is a paradox: two people become one, while remaining two individuals. Important nuances of love, according to the author:

1. If a person loves, he will give (himself, his life).
2. A person is completely interested in the life of his partner.
3. Partners must respect each other.

Fromm on objects of love

1. Brotherly love is fundamental, the basis of other types. This is respect, care, responsibility.
2. Mother's love is the first love in every person's life. Its essence, according to the author, should presuppose the woman’s desire for the child to be separated from her in the future.
3. Erotic love is complete carnal unity with one person.
4. Self-love. The author writes that this should not be confused with selfishness, these are different concepts. Only by loving oneself can a person become loved by someone else.
5. religious form of love.

Philosopher Carl Jung

What other philosophers talked about love? So, why not turn to the works of Carl Gustave Jung, who at the same time was a great psychiatrist and at the same time also a student of Sigmund Freud? His main and favorite phrase: “Nothing is possible without love,” from which many conclusions can already be drawn. According to the author, love is the most powerful all-conquering factor in a person’s life. Thus, it is impossible to consider this topic without two archetypes that are inherent in every person: Anima and the so-called personification of the unconscious principle of a representative of the opposite sex in the psyche of each individual person. These halves are attracted to people. What is love according to Jung? The definition of love that the author gives: the traits hidden in a person are found in another person and they attract him, arousing a feeling of love.

Anthropology about love

A science such as anthropology has also tried to define the word “love”. Special attention The work of the American scientist Helen Fisher “Why We Love: Nature and Chemistry” deserves romantic love" Here she identified three fundamental pillars of this feeling: attachment (a feeling of security and peace), romance (the most powerful stimulator of love) and lust (satisfaction of natural needs).

Religion

It is definitely worth mentioning that there is also a religious definition of love. The Bible says quite a lot about this feeling.

1. Prov. 10:12: “...a man’s love covers all his sins...”
2. Song of Songs, 8:6-7: “...love is strong as death; she is fierce as hell; her arrows are fiery; its flame is very strong. Rivers and large waters will not flood it.”
3. 1 Pet. 4:8 “...Have love for one another, because it covers all sins.”
4. 1 John 4:7-8,18: “... love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.”
5. 2 John 6 “...this is love: that all should walk according to the commandments of God.”

These are not all the quotes about love that can be found in the main book of humanity, but they fully reflect the mood and definition of this feeling according to religious canons.

Psychology

1. Passion. Attraction, excitement. This is the physical side of love.
2. Proximity. Friendship, unity. Emotional side.
3. Obligations. Willingness to solve the couple's problems, caring. This is the moral aspect of this feeling.

Love in Greek

The theme of love has been touched upon by all peoples and cultures. At this stage, I would like to talk about what types of love the ancient Greeks identified.

1. Agape. This is not just love, but more compassion. The highest type is when a person can give his all without expecting anything in return.
2. Eros is passion. However, this is not always a physical passion; it can also be a spiritual one. Eros by its nature is admiration, love.
3. Philia, or sons, is brotherly love. A calmer feeling, the main thing here is spirituality.
4. Storge is more like an attachment. Most often this is marital love.

These four types of love are still basic today, but in modern world Other subtypes also arise. An interesting type may be called mania - this is madness, love-obsession.

Household level

As was said above, for each person love is something special. Everyone understands it in their own way, there is nothing wrong with that. How can one characterize love in a simple way, without resorting to the opinions of scientists, writers or philosophers?

1. Love is the desire to do something good for a loved one, to constantly please him.
2. “What kind of love is there if I can’t breathe without him” (film “Love and Doves”). Love is the desire to always be with your loved one, if not physically, then at least mentally.
3. Love is constantly thinking about whether your loved one is doing well: is he warm, has he eaten, is everything okay with him.
4. Love is giving more than receiving, without thinking about it at all.

To love means to forgive, to try to be better, to not pay attention to shortcomings. Love is constant work not only on relationships, but also on yourself. This is work that can only be rewarded after years.

Throughout its history, humanity has been concerned with the theme of love. For some, love is evil, but for others it is good; For some, love turns into happiness and joy, and for others, into suffering and grief. Both for young people and for people who are already gray, this concept is necessary and purely personal. They look forward to love, try to find it in those around them, go to the ends of the earth for it, just to meet their one and only loved one. It can be found or lost, generated or killed. - This concept has not been fully studied. People sing and mourn their love, but it is very bitter to realize that it will not come to everyone. The knowledge gained from reading the article will help you understand and understand each other.

No one can accurately and clearly answer the question of what love is. Many sciences have studied love, but they have not been able to give an accurate definition of love as the most important and complex phenomenon. According to psychologists, love is a selective attitude of people towards each other, the attitude of one person towards another as towards himself. But each of us has our own opinion regarding the definition of love. For some, it is a habit and affection, for others it means only worries, tears and suffering, and for some, love is associated with family comfort, happiness and joy. However, it is quite difficult to convey your own feelings in words. Read about what they are on our website in the section.

A little history

Is it possible to say exactly at what moment love appeared on earth? It is quite difficult to say this for sure. We can only say one thing: in time, love has existed as long as humanity has lived on earth. Love has lived with people for many eras, sometimes losing its value. In different eras, the opinion of society and its views did not always treat love with understanding and tolerance. For many peoples of antiquity, love was something reprehensible, and sometimes shameful. Young people were reluctantly blessed for marriage if they found out that they loved each other. If a wife loved her husband, then it was something obscene. Many peoples of Africa and Asia do not have a word in their vocabulary that means love.

According to the ancient Greek thinker Lucretius, extramarital sexual relations are not shameful if there is no love between a woman and a man. As he believed, the call of the body is the same physiological need as hunger or thirst, and it must be satisfied. Love intoxication was considered an unnecessary excess.

For upper-class people, love was just a plebeian weakness. They advised their friends and loved ones who fell into love networks to show willpower and endure the torment, since love, as a rule, is blind. It was not allowed to mix the “blue blood” of aristocrats with the blood of plebeians. During the Middle Ages, love was sung for the sake of beautiful lady knights performed feats, but marriages, as a rule, were concluded without love.

In the twentieth century psychology of love and relationships between men and women, as a science, began to actively develop. In many countries, it has become prestigious to enter into a relationship not for love, but for love. Read useful information about on our website.

Love is a mystery

Only now have they begun to conduct research on love as a science, although this feeling can be studied for a long time. And now it is difficult to find answers to many questions, and some mysteries will probably remain unsolved. For many years, people believed that love, like a flash of lightning, enters a person. Later they began to understand that at first sight only infatuation appears, but not love. Whether or not it can develop into something more only after time. As a result, love is often confused with infatuation and passion. These feelings are not enough to create families. Meanwhile, these days, many couples converge on the basis of passion. The reason for many divorces is the unwillingness of one of the spouses, and sometimes both, to go through the entire process of developing this feeling. As psychologists say, love has many enemies, both external and internal. External enemies are found in the living conditions of the couple, and internal enemies are hidden within the spouses themselves, in their relationships. It's very difficult, we all want to create happy marriage for many years and worries a lot about this.

What is the mystery of love?

The mystery of love includes the fact that we see our loved one as if through rose-colored glasses. We see many advantages in him, without noticing the shortcomings at all. According to social psychologist Yu.B. Rurikova, this effect is called double optics. At such a moment, it is completely unclear whether we love a person or only what our consciousness has come up with. Stendhal once addressed this topic, trying to explain this mystery of love with the theory of crystallization. If you leave a simple branch in the salt caves, after a few weeks it will become a brilliant miracle. The same effect can be observed in love - the loved one is decorated, as if with crystals, with many positive qualities.

Another mystery of love can be called clairvoyance. A lover sees the most hidden depths of a loved one, his abilities, hidden virtues that may be revealed in the future.

There are other questions, for example, how long does love last, how many times in life can you love, how can you manage your feelings.

Limited capacity for love

Do all people have the same capacity for love? The basis of human love is the natural sexual attraction. However, not every person can develop it: it depends on many conditions. There is a type of people who cannot love unselfishly because they do not see the suffering of another person and do not feel that he is feeling bad. Emotionally they are deaf and blind. Can you blame them for this? Of course no! However, many people do not want to realize that their partner has a limited capacity for love. We not only look different, but we also feel differently than the other person.

As people get older, they change their attitude towards love. The ability to love undergoes certain changes. We will not be able to love in the same way as in our youth in our mature years. This love will be different.

Where is the ceiling of love?

A person who is intoxicated with passion can sacrifice a lot. He will do anything for his loved one, overcome any obstacles, get a star from the sky. However, we should not forget that this is the ceiling for his love, the highest point of manifestation of his feelings and spiritual impulses. A person can reach this point only in a state of love. It is no longer possible to rise higher. Each person has his own ceiling of love. For this reason, you should not force your loved one to jump to the ceiling or higher. There is no need to demand Shakespearean passions from him. You shouldn’t think: since you’ve already grown up, you already have the ability to love, and your partner is to blame for a relationship that doesn’t work out. Love can be called a gift from God, and not everyone has it to the same extent.

What is it like - many-sided love?

Thanks to certain conditions In the family of parents, a person develops the ability to love. For love to finally mature, many conditions are necessary. If any condition disappears, this ability may not develop.

As children, we learn love from our parents. From their example, we learn to show care and understanding to our loved one. Love can be towards parents, children, relatives and friends. However, these feelings a person has regarding different people are different. This means that this mysterious feeling does not have a specific configuration or pattern. It either exists or it doesn’t. Each of us puts our own meaning into it. Even among the ancient Greeks, there were two types of love. One of them was called eros. This meant love for something and for me. In social psychology, such love is called possessive. The other was called agape, which meant the desire to sacrifice everything for the sake of the beloved. Nowadays this feeling is called selfless. By the nature of a person’s experiences, they have much in common, so it is difficult to distinguish them.

Modern researchers have four more types of manifestations of love. One of them is storge, the second is mania, the third is pragma, and the fourth is ludus. They all have certain differences, but each has the right to exist.

We should also not forget about such concepts as falling in love, attraction, passion, flirting from which can develop real love. However, a difficulty arises: to distinguish true love from fake. In addition, there is a risk: considering true love a temporary whim and neglecting it through negligence.

About the laws of love

Like any other feeling, love has its own laws. From the moment it appears, it changes, gradually developing. It originates, goes through its stages of development, reaches its apogee and gradually begins to fade away. Why is this happening? Psychologists believe that there are fundamental laws here: interiorization and rhythm.

In accordance with the law of interiorization, feelings, like other mental phenomena, curl up and go into the depths of our consciousness. In a family, love does not necessarily have to fade over time. Over the years, the novelty of impressions wears off and a habit arises. As a result, love goes into the depths of consciousness, where it gradually fades away or waits in the wings. And at a certain moment it is reborn, like a Phoenix from a heap of ashes.

According to the law of rhythm, in the relationship between spouses, positive phases of the manifestation of feelings are replaced by negative ones. As a result, quarrels, disputes and conflicts may appear, which can lead to the death of love and relationships between spouses.

When does love end?

Each of us must answer this question ourselves. It depends only on the person’s desire to preserve his feelings. Many people break off relationships and leave their families because they were unable to maintain love and respect for their partner. New relationships can also end in failure. A person often does not want and cannot come to terms with solving his problems. Preserving feelings requires a lot of mental work.

There is no need to make efforts to destroy feelings - everything will work out by itself. If you don't help your feelings, then their life will be short. This is the main law of the psychological culture of love relationships.

To summarize, we can say that love is a psychological state of a person in which various emotions rage: from burning passion to hatred. should be actively studied by people in order to learn to understand their feelings, manage their emotions and direct them to building relationships.

Love is a set of emotions, actions and beliefs united by a strong feeling of affection, security, warmth and respect for another person.

Additionally, the concept of love can be applied to animals, abstract phenomena, or religious beliefs. For example, a person might say that he loves his cat, freedom, or God.

The best thing you can hold on to in life is each other.
Audrey Hepburn

Love has always been a popular topic of discussion, raised by philosophers, poets, writers and scientists for countless generations, and many of them have come up with different formulas for love, having their own views on its definition, conditions of occurrence and forms of manifestation.

While most researchers agree that love involves a strong feeling of affection, there is much disagreement about its exact meaning, resulting in different attitudes among different people.

Characteristics of love:

1. Higher priority for the well-being and happiness of the love object compared to one's own needs.
2. Strong feeling of affection.
3. Feelings of attraction and respect.
4. Desire to provide help and care.
5. A combination of the above characteristics.

There have been many debates about whether love is a free choice, or whether it is capable of enslaving despite the presence of will, whether it is permanent or fleeting, whether love between family members and spouses is biologically programmed or imposed by society.

The concept of love can vary depending on the individual as well as the culture in question. The result of every dispute about love is closer to the truth in relation to some time or place.

For example, in some cases love can be a choice, while in others it can be an uncontrollable feeling.

Love, passion (infatuation), romantic love

Especially in the early stages of a relationship, it can be difficult to discern the difference between love and passion (infatuation).

Combined with an overwhelming desire to be close to another person, both feelings are driven by physical attraction and the intoxicating effects of hormones, but only one of them is characterized by longevity - love.

Love is something that begins between two people and develops over a long period of time, experiencing many life ups and downs along the way. Therefore, love requires time, fidelity, mutual trust and acceptance of a person as he is.

Passion associated with sexual experiences that initially attract people to each other and are fueled by the desire to reproduce.

Passion, by blurring your consciousness with the influence of hormones and the idealization of the personality of its object, dulls the ability to see a person in his true light, and therefore it is not always able to become a direct path to a long-term relationship.

The ideal scenario for a strong relationship involves a balanced combination of love and passion.

Love, i.e. passionate infatuation with another person, combined with a feeling of attachment, form romantic love, which is important early stage long-term relationships.

Rekindling the original spark of passion is a practice that happy couples should definitely follow.

Love and passion. Differences

To determine for yourself the difference between love and passion, answer yourself 5 questions.

1. Does your relationship make you a better person?

Only love can make you feel like you are capable of anything, and for an extended period of time.

Passion carries within itself an opposite, destructive force. It stops you through restrictions on your freedom and implicit prohibitions on self-realization.

Passion worsens the quality of life of both partners, but love gives freedom, motivates, and makes lovers better.

2. Where is your “I”?

Is your Ego at the core of your relationship, or is your loved one at its center?

Do you prefer to give or receive?

Do you keep track of how much you did for your partner and how much he did for you?

If you're willing to do whatever it takes for your girlfriend or boyfriend without considering your own gain, from sending love messages to sacrificing your beliefs and principles, then it's probably love.

When you're in love, the other person's happiness is more important to you than your own well-being.

Passion is self-centered, but love is completely selfless.

3. What attracts you to your partner?

Passion for another person acts mainly on physical level, making you admire the appearance, body, voice, gait or object of attraction.

Love, first of all, is aimed at the partner’s personality, his inner world, way of thinking, life values ​​and other internal qualities.

Physical attractiveness is, of course, also important, but to a much lesser extent.

Thus, passion is based on external attraction, love - on internal personal values.

4. Are you being yourself in a relationship?

If each of you can answer “Yes,” you are definitely meant for each other.

If you are able to be yourself, telling your loved one about the most personal things, doing what you like, and not trying to control your behavior, you can be sure that this is love.

Honesty, complete trust, understanding, intimacy, mutual sympathy and romantic feelings create a stable platform for a long-term union.

When you don't have to wear masks to cover your true colors; when you are not afraid of being misunderstood, rejected, ridiculed, judged for who you are; when you always try to understand your partner's actions without judging - all these are the building blocks of true love, not passion.

Passion dictates the rules, but love frees you from inner servitude, it does not judge, it comes to you for who you are.

5. Are you ready to develop together?

Love cannot stumble or break. She is able to withstand all types of life obstacles that arise on a joint path, finding a way out of any current circumstances.

If you feel that you can be with this person forever, regardless of whether you receive the same amount of care and warmth as you give, that is love.

Passion is temporary and fleeting, so sooner or later a relationship based on it will end.

Passion flares up and goes out, ceasing to exist. Love is stable, deep and constant.

Love is timeless.

Love and mental health

And although there is no single truth regarding the definition of love, most people agree that love plays vital role both in physical and mental well-being.

Benefits of love:

1. The lack of love and care that children may experience almost always has a negative impact on their future lives to varying degrees.
2. The feeling of lack of love has a strong relationship with low love, and can cause a state of depression.
3. People who live loving lives tend to be happier.
4. Love and a sense of emotional unity can have a direct impact on health, helping to improve immunity.

Love and physiology

From an evolutionary perspective, love can be seen as a survival tool—a mechanism we evolved to promote long-term relationships, mutual protection, and parental support.

When you realize that someone is attractive to you, love, among other things, begins to manifest itself in the form of a biological process.

Your body is reinforcing what your mind already knows - this person is making you feel amazing.

When we feel close to another person, our brain signals our body to release hormones such as serotonin, oxytocin, vasopressin, dopamine and norepinephrine.

These chemicals cause us to become overwhelmed with loving thoughts and experience the physical sensations we associate with love.

More about “love hormones”:

1. Serotonin. This hormone improves your mood. Those who take certain illegal drugs cause a huge increase in serotonin levels. Instead, they could simply find someone who would love them - and there would be more benefits and health.

2. Oxytocin. Is the biological basis for love. This hormone is produced during sex, filling you with a feeling of affection for your lover.

3. Vasopressin. Along with oxytocin, it is responsible for the feeling of closeness to someone.

4. Dopamine. Bears responsibility for desire and reward, i.e. you feel great pleasure when you are rewarded with love, whether it is expressed through kindness, touch, a date night, or a feeling of happiness.

5. Norepinephrine. It is produced when you fall in love and feel the excitement of wanting everything to work out and develop well. Such physical sensations are manifested by a rapid heartbeat or clammy palms.

Stages of love (relationships)

1. Falling in love

Falling in love is the most exciting stage of love, and many will agree with this.

When a man and a woman find each other attractive, a spark of attraction flashes between them, causing them to drown in the ocean of romance and passion.

At this stage, you simply cannot stop thinking about the girl or guy, they are constantly on your mind. It is now that the meaning is most clearly manifested old saying"love is blind".

This “charm” stage brings a lot of romantic emotions, laughter, flirting and playfulness, and all negative traits partners are ignored. Much emphasis is placed on the similarities you both share.

People at this stage seem to “fly” when they are together, and cannot wait to be close to each other if they are separated. Butterflies fly in the stomach, and trembling hearts seem to freeze.

At such moments, most people are sure that they have found their soulmate, but the underlying reason for all these uncontrollable emotions is physiology.

“Love hormones” make you feel euphoric, induce a cheerful mood filled with happiness, and increase your overall energy level. It seems that you are a different person, your sexuality is at its peak, you feel like you can handle anything, you are simply fearless.

In this state, you are able to get married before moving on to the next stage of love, ignoring the underlying flaws in your partner.

Undoubtedly considered romantic feeling it seems wonderful while it lasts, but it cannot last forever, even if you really want it to.

By combining with feelings of intimacy and affection, infatuation transforms into romantic love.

2. Saturation (addiction)

After several months of living together, when the “chemistry of love” ceases its active phase of influence, couples return to their usual selves with their usual mood and level of attraction.

Things return to normal and instead of focusing on each other, the couple becomes more active professionally and in other daily activities.

Young people who are unaware of this stage of love may think that the feelings have passed. Sometimes they may get upset due to lack of attention from their lover.

Minor disagreements and even quarrels are a normal part of this stage. It's worth recognizing that healthy confrontation is natural because it helps both of you understand the situation better.

As you learn to resolve problems and conflicts that arise, your relationship will become more mature.

At this stage of love, you may wonder why your intimate life has become a little insipid, or why sometimes you notice your partner’s irritation.

You begin to evaluate your other half more objectively, and the conclusions that come to mind can cause delight or apathy.

What you need to do is move on. The best is yet to come, even if you feel like the relationship has faded.

3. Disgust (quarrels)

You may have a lot of expectations from your loved one. You can even try to bring your partner closer to your ideal image.

This stage of love resembles a power struggle, and sometimes relationships end if one party dominates the other too much.

Instead of focusing on the similarities, as you so cleverly did when you were in love, you now focus on your partner's differences and shortcomings.

Some couples are at this stage. Others, experiencing pain and dissatisfaction in relationships, come to the conclusion that true love is associated with compromises, and instead of withering away in the conflicts that arise, one can find a way out with the help of understanding, warmth and kindness.

4. Humility (understanding)

Reaching this stage of love means that you now understand your partner much better.

At this stage, couples are in a joyful state, but do not stop making efforts to work on their relationship.

Now both partners accept each other for who they really are, but they should not rest on their laurels. Avoid misunderstandings and continue to get to know each other better.

The stages of love can often bring turmoil into relationships, but if you are aware of their existence, moving from one stage to another will not be such a difficult task for you.

To move to the next stage, accept each other's strengths and weaknesses. You need to focus on the positive, not focus on the negative, and learn about the goals and interests of each of you.

5. Study

Once a couple goes through the aforementioned stages of love, all unrealistic expectations tend to disappear.

Each party begins to open up more and more to each other, and there is a clearer understanding of how they can work together effectively in the relationship.

Couples begin to define and clarify their roles in the relationship, as well as their compatibility with each other.

There is a need to resolve certain issues, such as how much time a guy and a girl like to spend together and how long to stay alone, how each party is used to expressing and receiving love, etc.

Once couples can effectively communicate their needs to each other, they will be able to avoid many unpleasant things, such as aggressive behavior, avoidance, criticism or defensiveness.

Focus instead on understanding, compassion, forgiveness and patience.

6. Proximity

This is the stage when they experience true intimacy. They support each other even better by giving and receiving love in return.

Ups and downs are an integral part of any relationship. However, the trust and loyalty of both partners will be able to carry them through these troubles without significant obstacles.

At this stage of love, each of you will stop focusing on your own personality and shift your attention to what is best for the relationship.

Now you feel unity, individuality, and love for each other. At the same time, the spirit of unity still prevails, further strengthening your relationship.

At this stage, you feel like an ideal couple. Many lovers may even decide to tie their fate with family ties, since they have come so far.

7. Doubts

Usually this stage occurs after many years of marriage. You can start thinking about your ex-lovers and past relationships, or start comparing your current partner with previous ones.

At this stage, much depends on the level of satisfaction with the existing relationship. If you feel dissatisfied and hurt, you tend to blame your partner for it.

You may even start comparing your relationship to other couples in your circle.

But you shouldn’t add fuel to the fire, because you are able to get through this not the most fun stage.

8. Sexuality

At this stage of love, your intimate life plays a key role. Changes in sexual preferences are possible when one of you becomes less interested in realizing wild fantasies, or, conversely, wants to do something incredible.

If there is a significant difference in your passions, one of the partners may have an affair.

The key to solving the main problem at this stage is to find creative ways to make your sex life more varied and exciting, thereby strengthening your relationship.

9. Love

This highest stage relationships where both partners completely love and trust each other. However, sometimes the complete trust you have developed can cause you to take each other for granted, so be careful.

At this stage of love, you know each other very well, you know what to expect from each other, and you also clearly understand the direction of the relationship.

Even though there is complete bliss and understanding at this stage, do not stop appreciating and respecting your partner because love should be constantly cultivated and developed.

Remember that love is like a plant that needs nourishment to keep it alive.

34 interesting facts about love

1. Monogamy

And although humans would like to think that we are completely different from the rest of the animal kingdom, we are not the only creatures whose relationships are characterized by monogamy.

Wolves, gibbons, albatrosses and even termites are known to choose a mate for life.

2. Time required to evaluate attractiveness

First impressions are very important, especially when you consider that it only takes 4 minutes to decide whether you like someone or not.

It's not just how he looks and what he says that influences, but also his body language and the tone and speed of his voice.

3. Synchronization

If two lovers look into each other's eyes for a long time, their heartbeats will synchronize in about 3 minutes.

4. Addiction

Falling in love is similar to the effects of drugs because it uses similar parts of the brain and causes similar chemical reactions.

So, away with the use of illegal substances, instead, love and be loved.

5. Reduce headaches

Oxytocin, the love hormone produced by the body during hugs, helps reduce headaches and improve sleep.

The next time you have a headache, just hold your loved one close to you.

6. Levels of attractiveness

People often fall in love and begin relationships with others who have a similar level of attractiveness.

If someone in a relationship is physically more attractive, then, most likely, he compensates for the existing disadvantages due to the presence of other important socio-cultural qualities.

7. Too identical

Couples in which people are too similar tend to break up quickly.

Researchers have found that similarities help form the foundation of a relationship, but if partners have nothing to learn from each other, they are more likely to break up.

So opposites attract.

8. Time limit

Scientists believe that the peak of infatuation or romantic love occurs around one year after the start of a relationship.

We remind you that it is falling in love that makes you experience euphoria and butterflies in your stomach.

After falling in love passes, the relationship ends or moves on to more high level, transforming into true love.

9. Associations

Research shows that a loving mindset has a positive effect on creativity, abstract thought, and long-term planning.

Thinking about a fleeting intimate relationship affects immediate decision making and attention to the current moment.

10. Face or body?

People looking for a short-term fling are more concerned about their partner's attractive body than the beauty of his face.

In contrast, those wishing to enter into a long-term relationship prioritize the attractiveness of the face over the body.

11. Hold hands

The next time you find yourself stressed, try holding your loved one's hand, because romantic handshakes can help reduce stress and feelings of physical pain.

12. Gratitude

Expressing gratitude to your loved ones results in an immediate spike in happiness levels.

13. Butterflies in the stomach

The butterflies in your stomach that you feel when you fall in love are a result of your body producing the hormone adrenaline.

14. Pupils of the eyes

When you look at your loved one, even if it is just a photograph, the pupils of your eyes will dilate.

It should be added that people with dilated pupils are perceived as more attractive.

Therefore, it is not surprising that when you are in a relationship, you seem more attractive to the opposite sex.

15. Finding love

Long-term research has led to the conclusion that the happiness and life of most people almost always revolve around love or the search for love.

So even if you don't find your other half, just searching will lead to a happy life.

16. Lucky number seven

On average, people fall in love seven times before they finally decide to start a family. The seventh attempt, as a rule, becomes the reason for marriage.

17. Male gaze

On average, a man spends a whole year in his life looking at women.

18. Self-esteem

People with higher self-esteem tend to have longer-lasting and more successful relationships.

If you are not capable, why expect this high feeling from other people?

19. Emotions during separation

Statistically, men are more susceptible to negative emotional impact due to a breakup than women.

20. Long life

It is believed that husbands who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer. And this is another five years extra to see your loved ones every morning.

21. Dislike

Some people are unable to experience love due to a condition called hypopituitarism, due to a decrease or complete cessation of hormone production by the pituitary gland.

22. Symmetry

Facial symmetry is the basis of beauty and attractiveness, or so the human brain thinks.

Those with symmetrical facial features make love more often and can boast of a large number of fans.

23. Rose-colored glasses

Being in love suppresses the parts of the human brain responsible for perceiving social judgment.

Nobody wants to think about falling in love with a terrible person.

24. Love quest

Romantic situations involving obstacles that arise in the path of lovers are important factors in falling in love, influencing how deeply you fall in love.

The longer the romantic path and the more intricacies, the brighter and stronger the feelings of love and longing appear.

25. Dark side love

According to statistics, more than 50% of murders of women are committed by their lovers or husbands.

26. Treason

Almost 60% married men claimed to have been unfaithful to their wives. Married women responded with a figure of 40%.

This information was compiled from a survey, so dishonesty on the part of either group cannot be ruled out.

27. Crisis of four years

Most marriages around the world experience a relationship crisis after four years of marriage.

Next important stage which the spouses have to overcome awaits them after the next four years, i.e. upon the eighth anniversary.

28. Forever young

Usually men marry women for the first time who are the same age as them or within 3 years younger.

When remarried, the age difference is usually approximately 5 years.

For the third time, a man most likely pays attention to women who are 8 or more years younger than him.

29. Biology

The desire to love, like the desire to eat food, is a biological stimulus with which we are born.

So even men are more lovers than warriors.

30. Dangerous Lover

You are more likely to fall in love with someone (especially women) if you are in a dangerous situation.

31. Beer belly

Women are less attracted to men who have decided to reward themselves with a beer belly.

The presence of an excessively protruding male belly indicates lower testosterone levels, which means a reduced ability to reproduce.

32. Sense of humor

A sense of humor is most often associated with honesty and intelligence.

This is why most women are attracted to men who can show off humor.

33. Competition

Male attractiveness increases if a man is surrounded by other women.

34. Voice

Men with a lower voice timbre women's eyes seem more worthy of attention.

Useful tips

Love is a word that has flashed through every person’s head at least once. It either brings joy, frightens, or motivates.

Existence love and its meaning has been debated for centuries. So what is love?

Poets and scientists tried to find an answer to this question. And we can say for sure that there IS an answer to this question - love is... in fact, it all depends on which side you approach this question from.

Different definitions of love

From a romantic's point of view: love is perfection

What is love to you? Do you think that love is worth it without disagreement? Do you think that partners should always understand each other? If you can explain love this way, then you are a true romantic.

You may open up, but it is still worth noting that love at first sight does not exist. In fact, to find love you need to work hard. According to Sally Connolly, a psychotherapist for 30 years, insisting on the idea of ​​perfect love will only harm the relationship.

From a scientist's point of view: the essence of love lies in the sense of smell

If you love analysis, then perhaps your love lies in biology. There is even scientific evidence for the existence of love. Scientists from the University of Bern in Switzerland conducted a study based on the connection between our sense of smell and attraction to another person. They discovered that major histocompatibility complex(MCG) in human DNA (a region of the genome that plays a large role in the immune system and immune development) causes love for another person.

From a realist's point of view: love is like an ocean

For a realist, love is comparable to the ocean with its constant waves, ebbs and flows. This explanation of love is the most correct. It is difficult to give an exact definition of love. Loving and keeping love takes work, but the reward is a healthier, more fulfilling, and lasting relationship.

What is not love

While the definition of love depends on how you look at it, there are a few specific things that definitely shouldn't be confused with love.

Infatuation and love

Falling in love is a feeling that occurs at the very beginning of a relationship. That love that keeps us awake at night, distracts us during the day and constantly invigorates us is not really love, but infatuation, which is very easy to confuse with love. Many of us fall into this trap. Are you asking yourself "what is love?" and then you convince yourself that the feeling you experience at the beginning of a relationship is love. If you think so, then your relationship will not last long, but true love lasts a long time.

Passion and love

Many people also confuse these two concepts. What is the difference? If you pay more attention to your partner’s appearance, if you often think about “bedroom communication,” then this is more passion than love. This is another trap that is easy to fall into, since we always hope for the best and convince ourselves of the existence of something that actually does not exist.

It is quite easy to ignore obvious gaps in a relationship, since it is very difficult to break up with someone you care about. If you confuse the concepts of passion and love, then you will get stuck in fantasies, instead of coming down to earth and finding true love.

Friendship and love

These feelings can be very similar, and this can confuse you. This is because we may fall in love with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or feel like your romantic partner is your friend. We spend a lot of time with friends, so it's hard to imagine life without them.

A similar feeling arises in relation to our soul mates and the boundaries sometimes become blurred.

If you're confused about your relationship with someone, try paying attention to the chemistry and intensity of your feelings. In general, than stronger feelings to another person, it is all the more likely that this is love and not friendship.

Emotional dependence and love

Sometimes it seems to us that we are in love, but in fact, it is an emotional dependence. How to understand this? There are several questions to ask yourself.

Do you strive to idealize your partner? Are you very afraid of losing him or her? Is the relationship more important to you than the partner himself? If you answered “yes” to all of these questions, then you are in an emotionally dependent relationship, and that is not love. But don't beat yourself up over it. It is quite easy to become emotionally dependent, since the fear of losing a partner, as well as the desire to idealize him, are completely normal things.

These feelings can be experienced by people who are in romantic relationships, but sometimes we can take it too far. Remember, you belong to yourself just as much as your partner. Love allows us to be ourselves.