Many of the women find their husbands among the military. For those who doubt the choice, it will be useful to imagine the disadvantages and advantages of such a union. What awaits a woman who decides to connect her life with a military man?

Pros of marriage to a military man

They are strong. A mandatory medical examination eliminates weak and non-viable “specimens”; the defender of the Motherland must be healthy. Women are intuitively drawn to hardy and physically strong men, choosing a candidate for the father of a child http://gruastarrega.com/map167.

They are in demand. Despite everything, the military profession is still prestigious in our society. Defender of the Motherland - that's what it sounds like! continue reading

You will have to give birth away from your mother (scary!) and take care of the baby alone. A military husband is a bad helper with night feedings and changing diapers.

read article Kindergarten, most likely, “does not shine”, and the child will change schools more than once. In general, it will be difficult to “put down roots” and feel stability. In the closed world of a military garrison, a young woman can feel very uncomfortable and lonely. And all personal life- in full view...

But is everything really so hopeless? No, of course not! Common interests will allow you to find true friends among the same “Decembrists”. An unexpected career option is possible in the outback. Of course, you won’t be able to spend a vacation in Egypt, but you can see the most beautiful corners our country - quite real.

Types of husbands in uniform

Eternal cadet. This guy won't mature anytime soon. He admires his own “coolness” and does not suspect that the situation is under the reliable control of his wife, who herself chose him, having provided for many nuances. This option is only suitable for strong women, capable of pushing their cadet into generals patiently and purposefully.

The hussar is the soul of the company. You should not expect consistency or special promotions. His element is a cheerful life without obligations. It’s easy for someone like that to be thrown out of service because of drunken parties and “immorality.” A woman who dreams of strong family and stability, “hussar” is absolutely not suitable.

"Agent 007". This is a person with a strong character, systematically moving towards his goal. Typically has a strong character good manners and a grip of steel. Cynical and pragmatic, knows how to get his way. He marries quite late and not at all according to his heart.

A real soldier. Career growth, service and everything connected with it constitute the meaning of his life, the rest is secondary. The wife will have to carry life and children completely on her shoulders. In return, she is provided with a reliable rear. This option is suitable for women who are ready to devote themselves completely to serving their husband and children and abandon their own interests.

In conclusion, it should be recognized that if there are mutual feelings and the ability to tolerate the peculiarities of the profession, marriage with a military man can become a happy union for a long life.

Today, when we hear a man - a military man, a certain point clicks in women's heads. A military man is not just a man. Today, this is not only a man with prospects for an apartment, good earnings, etc., but also a man with a certain character and a certain psychology of behavior and attitude, who does not quite fit the general statistics.

I would like to clarify right away: A military man is an ordinary man! Military men can also joke, have fun, give gifts and appear like the men of dreams, just as a military man can be laconic, almost unemotional.

Of course there are some nuances

It is no secret that the main type of employment shapes the way of thinking and the psychology of behavior. A man, being in a military system, over time begins to live by this system and demand that both his chosen one and all family members accept it and comply with it. Of course, this affects the psychology of behavior, daily routine and emotional perception of the world and others.

When creating a relationship and then a family with a military man, you must clearly understand that with such a man You can't be frivolous. Such a man will require from you a sober understanding of the situation, a rational attitude towards his service, and the ability to quickly and positively respond to all changes that occur. You must understand that you will most likely have to give up your favorite places, girlfriends, work, because... A trip to another region is always possible. The life of a military man is always on the move, so You must clearly give yourself a clear answer to a number of questions:

1. Am I ready for life out of suitcases?

2. Am I ready to look for something to do in every new place?

3. Am I ready to live away from my family?

If yes, then feel free to enter into a relationship, because... with this approach, they will be happy.

Now let's return to the question of the psychology of interaction with the chosen one

Dear girls, you will always be support and support for your military man. You are the one who can develop in him all those qualities and skills that will help him in his career advancement. All we need from you is a little more understanding, patience, care and love.

Like any man, it is important for a military man to receive positive emotions from you. If you are always well-groomed, look good, and are in a good mood, your man will appreciate it. If a military man is rude to you or practically doesn’t talk to you, think about it: maybe it’s not just that he’s a military man and psychology has nothing to do with it, maybe it’s you?

Evaluate yourself soberly and accept yourself for who you are and start working on yourself. You shouldn’t ask a man “What’s wrong with me?” You will either not get an answer, or you will hear something that hurts you and this will make the situation even worse. You yourself know your pros and cons and you have the power to change it. When you change for the better, your man will immediately respond.

Don't ask a military man to spend a lot of time listening to your problems. Such men are focused on problems on a regional or national scale and everything you say will seem completely empty to him and to some extent he will be right.

You should not reproach him for not spending enough time with the child. You must initially understand that a military man will not be able to do this, no matter how much you want it, due to his busyness and heavy workload. Just know that a man loves a child and as soon as he has free time, and he will be in the right mood, he will definitely show his love for his child.

Remember, you yourself chose this person and knew that he was a military man and the whole peculiarity of the psychology of his behavior. Consider this a huge plus. He is constantly at work, which means you have time for yourself. Do the things you love, sign up for a club for your hidden talents, improve your cooking skills.

What to do if you have (or even several) a child, a man in the service and you have to constantly give strength to education? To give all the time or not to give is your choice, there are no laws where this would be established. Therefore, use the services of a nanny, friends, relatives (if they are nearby). It is up to you to find time for yourself. And remember, no one needs this but you, so don’t be upset if your man doesn’t react in any way and doesn’t support you in your aspirations to become better.

It is important to understand that there is no difference between a man and a male military man. The psychology of behavior towards a woman will always be the same.

Become the woman of your man’s dreams and then you will not feel that the military system and some features in the psychology of behavior in any way affect your life together.

Remember, man is different from man, regardless of whether he is a military man or not. And the psychology of behavior will always have nuances, so evaluate yourself and him soberly and be patient. You will bear this honorable duty together. You are a fighting friend and support.

Take care of yourself and your man. Good luck to you!

To be honest, military dating is a highly debated topic. Many women have found their soulmate among the military. And for those ladies for whom such a prospect is just emerging, we will tell you about the pros and cons of such a union - after all, as they say, forewarned is forearmed!

At any moment you can find yourself in such a hole that you never dreamed of. But every cloud has a silver lining.

Marriage to a military man provides a fairly reliable rear

Reliable in material terms. After all, people in uniform receive their salaries on time, plus they have various bonuses: advantages in solving housing problems, once a year free travel for the family to any place, food rations.

We intuitively feel that this type is an ideal candidate for the father of a future child. Of course, it’s scary to give birth far from your mother; you’ll have to forget about buying an apartment and going on vacation in Egypt. But this is the best time to start a career. There are much more opportunities in the outback. will appear new circle communication. As a rule, these are the same “Decembrists” with problems similar to yours.

Before jumping headlong into the dating pool, we suggest you find out what types of military people exist.

Psychotypes of military men

People in uniform are:

1.Hussars. This is a charming, darling husband who knows all your weaknesses. And not only yours. So don’t expect consistency from him, nor do you expect promotion. A cheerful and wild life is his element. So, if you want comfort and stability, think a thousand times about whether to marry him.

2. Special agents. He has good manners, intelligence, humor, strength of character, an iron grip. This is a cynical seducer. The main thing for him in life is victory. You will have the best memories about him. He marries at a fairly mature age.

3. Scouts. He is a calm, self-possessed, slightly reserved man of duty. He will appear at home very rarely. All his interests are aimed at career growth. If you are ready to devote all of yourself to serving this person, prepare for the fact that the house and children will be yours alone. But you can rest assured in your rear.

But in any case, the final decision about dating is up to you. Remember this when you decide your destiny.

A man dressed in a military uniform is an example of masculinity and reliability; military bearing, uniform and a clear gait only complement the image we have drawn.

The appeal of a military uniform

A military, tax or customs uniform, under which a fit and pumped up figure is hidden, is the dream of every woman. Why does it turn out that law enforcement officers have such magnetism?

Everything is explained quite simply, men in uniform are strong-willed people who can take one hundred percent responsibility in difficult situation and emerge victorious. Perhaps this was facilitated by the strength of character that manifested itself at a young age, which led the young man to choose this profession, or perhaps the form leaves its mark on him, making him persistent and reliable.

Qualities of a man in uniform

Due to the specifics of the profession they chose in their youth, a representative of a law enforcement agency dressed in uniform usually has all of the above-mentioned qualitative characteristics. From such a representative strong half, a powerful energy of strength emanates, they are smart and organized, in crisis situations they quickly make strong-willed decisions, without being afraid to take on any responsibility.

Willingness for heroic deeds, loyalty, honesty, determination and daily readiness to perform noble deeds - these character traits have always been inherent in real men, both in peacetime and in wartime. Military service requires men to demonstrate the best human qualities, which include: reliability, dignity, courage, resourcefulness.

Men in military uniform are a person who has the ability to quickly solve the most difficult, sometimes impossible tasks assigned to him, which he overcomes with dignity, sometimes risking his life, for the sake of a peaceful sky above his head. A person in uniform is a role model for many.

A military uniform cannot automatically instill in a person: dedication, responsibility and self-confidence, nor can it reduce the negative traits of his character. Military man - a common person, he may be quarrelsome, boring or, as is commonly believed, has the character of a “real martinet” in its most unromantic form. Therefore, when admiring men in shape, there is no need to give them an overly “caramelized” appearance; remember, they are ordinary people, with their own advantages and disadvantages.

Cobra man (or psychology military uniform)

This is a man who inspires fear; It is not difficult to recognize this typology. If you feel strong internal fear, it means that in front of you is a man who is either too strong in his negativity, or who uses certain mental stereotypes that are destructive for a woman (we are talking about stereotypes, the influence of which she experienced in childhood, so when meeting a man of this type, a woman fails). Very often, such subjects serve in the army, they are all prone to animal violence, and the military uniform gives them the right to do it. They use internal intimidation, a kind of mental violence.

They are as rough as a cobra or a rattlesnake. They are not smart: they only know one attack technique. Therefore, it is safe behind them, however, if you get into their eyes, you can become like a victim who herself goes into the mouth of the cobra that is hypnotizing her. Such a man in himself is not dangerous; it is others who see him this way who make him dangerous. It is characterized by a certain form of mental roughness, before which the victim becomes numb, losing the ability to critically assess the situation.

Men of this type, which are rare, can be anyone - policemen, clergymen, teachers, judges. They are capable of mental domination only under appropriate conditions provided by the social “Super-Ego” in some form. They seem to send a signal to the victim: “Listen, I know that you are weak,” resonating with the point at which he is weak or real. They can be compared to a woodpecker, which pecks at a tree with strong bark exactly where the worm is hiding.

Such a man senses where a woman’s weakness lies, and suppresses her with fear. And then the woman, gripped by fear, becomes submissive, infantile, stupid. There is no connection with sex here: an investigation is being conducted inside the woman, and she is forced to behave like a puppet to please the man. For example, she laughs in a certain way, speaks, says some nonsense... In order to protect herself at this moment, she seems to fall into some kind of absolute “relaxation”, like animals that - so as not to be hit - fall on their backs : This is unconditional surrender. A woman is defenseless in front of such a man, so she finds a way out by “playing the fool.”

Terminator

A real man will never harm a woman, since the negative influence comes only from the one who, in order to get closer to her, affectively takes advantage of her weakness, hiding his masculinity. The mental structure of such men, who are interested in a certain type of woman, differs from the psychology of a worm man. Such a man can be compared to a little boy with perversely devilish tendencies: this is a terminator.

“The Terminator” drives a woman to inevitable self-destruction, provoking the onset of a disease that corresponds to its complex theme. By attracting a certain type of woman, he contributes to their complete exhaustion.

The terminator is characterized by elegant arrogance of behavior and constant interactivity despite external mediocrity: his superficial judgments and maxims uttered from memory regarding things of which he is absolutely ignorant create the impression that they come from a smart and competent person.

The Terminator is not bluffing or “trying,” but acts like a little dictator in everything and everywhere where he is given the opportunity to feel like an infantile being placed on a pedestal.

The woman does not pay much attention to him, considering him insignificant and perceiving him as an ally. He never argues with a woman, doing what she tells him. However, most likely, he may turn out to be exponent of a woman’s latent complex: it may turn out to be a terminator detector. Being part of a certain theme, he is guilty only to a certain extent . Ontopsychology knows that the real culprits are the victims, as even dreams testify to.

The complex of women who are attracted to men of this type consists of innate psychological motherhood, which has nothing to do with biological motherhood. This is a form of spontaneous female devotion, born of the generosity of her emotion: she is abundant and giving of herself.

For his part, the man creates his own image in the woman’s inner world - the image of the last, late child, but does not express this outwardly. He seems to be telling her: “Do you see how small I am, how innocent and defenseless I am? Take me with you".

He does not ask for help, but gives the impression of purity and unblemished integrity. There is no purity in everything he does, but it is presented that way. Being polite, he always takes the woman's side, constantly extolling her virtues. This is a rigid infantile creature erected on a pedestal, which a woman perceives with her mind as an indisputable authority. Other men, on the contrary, treat him with admiration.

I did not have the opportunity to study this type before, because women hide these subjects or do not see them: such men calmly fit into a certain environment, choosing from a variety of women the most functional for those around them. Therefore they they infect not just the woman as such, but only the one who implements the social action.

3.10.6. Empty phallocrate 127

Men of this type constantly promise a woman - softly, gracefully, using mostly subtext - a certain sexuality that they never show outwardly. The lower abdomen of men of this type seems to represent one of the key reference points for the deviation monitor. He is not a terminal, but a synthesizer for a terminal: by imposing the image of his penis, he reactivates in every woman he attracts what is already fertilized in her.

The penis gradually exposed by this man serves as the image through which he triggers obsession and makes contact; people (both men and women) are immediately at his mercy and monopolized by him different ways(coitus, love, morbid curiosity, etc.). In particular, the image of the genital area of ​​a man of this type produces a mental capture, but never an organismic contact: the image is blocked, causing obsession in the brain; it is systemic penetration at the cerebral level.

Ram man

A man of this type indulges a woman’s sexual obsession, which arises from her own jealousy. The Ram man, in response to a woman’s sexual advances, begins to play the role of a “piston,” increasingly exacerbating her obsessive state. Such a man, who is like a machine gun constantly swallowing tokens, holds on for a while and then finally collapses.

Lazy man

This is a calm, normal, mediocre man who could, but does not want to “work.” This attitude towards sex is typical for many men: they are made lazy by the inaccessibility of women who demand the performance of a whole ritual (dancing, restaurant, tender words etc.). However, there is no erection because there is no attention, which is a psycho-emotional category and not related to the body.

Male individuals - both people and animals - act, although in different ways, only after the organismic order of a woman. A positive woman has her own vital phases, which she, however, has ceased to be aware of, replacing them with obsession.

A lazy man looks at things economically, realizing that, in essence, it is not difficult to enter into a relationship with a woman, but it is difficult to get out of this relationship, unless she leaves him herself. If a woman is not given attention, she begins to take revenge - to be jealous, to demand money, to blackmail, etc.

The world of femininity is like a minefield, and men who fail to overcome it cannot reach the truth. However, on the path to the truth, a woman must show maturity by abandoning her obsessive strategy.

Male sage

This type of man is extremely rare. When dating a woman, he always runs the risk of being drawn into "warfare", since he immediately tells her whether she corresponds to his life instinct and grace or not, since he does not intend to cultivate her obsession. A sage who is able to grasp and understand the semantics of a woman’s erotic integrity can arrange a “holiday” for her, managing to wait for the right moment, or, when necessary, leave on time.

3.11. Karma 128

From the moment of our existence, we are placed in a system of space-time coordinates that denote the phenomenology of movement, or becoming. When we are born, we are involved in an irreversible process: the blood circulates, the lungs absorb and exhale air, the stubble shaved today is not at all the same as three days ago. Becoming is merciless, it cannot be stopped, biological movement is irreversible, everything matures. Only one thing can develop in open space - the mind, which is capable of moving at its own discretion, because it knows how to escape time and space; this is a property of the onto In-se.

An individual, having been born, immediately begins his run, each step is measured by the coordinates of time and space: any choice made presupposes an irreversible change that determines the next one.

Suppose a person, while climbing a mountain, loses his way or falls: if he notices this, then he has to start all over again, but if not, he will never reach his goal. But, having realized his mistakes, the subject no longer returns to his previous starting position.

If a choice allows the subject to achieve a high position, then his fall, bordering on pathology, may be caused either by a serious mistake or by some intermediate phase of mediocrity. A healthy subject may well “slip”, but this will never entail serious consequences. By being positive and noticing a mistake, you can continue to move forward and make an evolutionary leap.

If, on the contrary, the development of the subject is pathological, and he is aware of this, the only thing that remains for him to do, despite the loss of ten to twelve years, is to start all over again, using the time at his disposal. It does not happen that a subject, having realized the pathological nature of his movement, immediately returns to his original position and begins to grow: first the original status quo of the potential must be restored. So, in order to return to the beginning, the subject must, first of all, first pay off all debts (mistakes made) and only then begin further development during the period that is allotted to him (thirty, forty, fifty years).

Karma is the consequence of an erroneous action that is contrary to the vital essence of the subject. Errors in behavior lead to obsessive repetition in accordance with the thematic selection of the error, in other words, in accordance with the characteristics of the complex.

An erroneous connection involves a loss of time and mind. Awareness of a mistake made does not automatically save you from its consequences. Time is lost, so the individual should humbly begin with what preceded the mistake. As soon as the error is realized, the action caused by it stops, but it is necessary to wait out the time of karma, that is, the final elimination of its consequences by time, logic, meetings, situations that need to be streamlined. It is necessary to gradually return to health, to a state of balance and well-being.

That is why almost no one manages to achieve that optimal virtuality that life assumes in every individual. Life always comes, it always wins, it is not an opponent who stops, gives up or waits. Let's imagine that an athlete breaks his leg: he must stop performing and undergo treatment for at least three to four years until full function is restored, and then resume training to regain his previous skills, and only then strive for new achievements. The mistake cannot be ignored: if a person wants to grow further, then he must pay for the mistake, and if he refuses to grow, then he becomes a zombie and will live, increasingly plunging into pathology.

To achieve more high level existence, it is necessary to live, adhering to a certain sequence in the choice of methods, people and situations. These choices must be different from those of the average person. It is necessary to choose a completely different path and a different style. It is not easy to eradicate from oneself the habitual way of thinking and the craving for the usual environment (friends, relatives, and so on), since the environment tries to return the subject to his former life or push him lower. No environment strives to make him better 129 .

Nature has its own rationality; it achieves its equilibrium not in leaps and bounds, but through constant preparation, through progressive development. Having realized his own mistake, the subject must wait until the consequences of guilt fade away. After the fatal mistake of the conscious-logical “I”, the onto In-se is blocked for self-defense, because it has no path of development. When, during psychotherapy, I tell a person that, psychologically, he is, for example, four years old, this means that his Inse stopped in its development at precisely this age.

Falling under the influence of the deviation monitor, a person begins to follow too many stereotypes, which clog the brain, leading to alienation. The subject independently “sculpts” himself on the basis of a false idea of ​​himself, causing harm to himself, while the vital core is blocked, remaining true to himself. As if in the cytoplasmic region of onto-In-se, existential schizophrenia receives its right to exist. The subject’s emotions, thoughts, and behavior begin to acquire the character of deviations; all kinds of deviations, deceit, sexual perversions take over the brain so much that the subject identifies with them. In fact, they do not enter into his core, but into the area of ​​historical acquisition, which now fills his head, and the individual, with all his desire, cannot find his true basis without outside help. An ontotherapist can provide this assistance to him by restoring the ontic action in the subject. It was this reality that gave birth to the concept of repentance, fasting, and Ramadan among all great nations as voluntary retribution for the existential debt of a subject who made a technical mistake in building his own life. My psychotherapeutic experience confirms that a mistake is always caused by the choices of the subject himself, regardless of his personal qualities or situation. There is always a certain “yes”, which entails other erroneous agreements, which ultimately binds the individual. The subject always makes a mistake in choosing when superficially convinced that he can overcome any situation. When he makes a choice, he thinks he can go back. Nevertheless, the story has a certain weight: if an individual has spent money, then to get it back it is not enough just to constantly think about it: there is no more money, and you need to start earning money again, having first paid off your debts.

An error is a consequence of a certain irresponsibility a subject who thinks that everything is allowed to him. Mistakes are always made at the moment when everything is going great for a person. They don’t happen when he’s already feeling bad, when he’s already made a mistake. The individual does not understand that this apparent freedom of judgment at the moment of success is in fact strictly regulated, therefore, when he determines his choice, life will sum it up.

Let me give you an example. One person makes ten million in profit. Instead of putting it in the bank, he immediately buys a car for twenty-five million: ten million is paid immediately, the rest in installments. He was mistaken, and these ten million profits turn into a possible loss, because in a month he will have to support not only himself, but also the car, paying off the loan in addition. Thus, having received instant gratification, he takes on a debt of fifteen million and worries about maintaining the car.

At every step of the subject, even if he does not make a choice, history binds him, time fetters him. Another example would be youth. At this time, a person must study, acquiring a certain surplus value for his own formation in the future. If a young man wastes his life thoughtlessly and superficially (motorcycles, girls, music, etc.), then he does not fully use his own natural potential, wasting time and, in the end, remaining undeveloped 130.

Life is highly rational. Neither stereotypes nor culture help a person understand the measure of chastity and purity that life has in the “density dimension” of behavior. Often faced with the absolute conviction of people who want to take a certain action, even if it is wrong, I understand that for them it is just an opinion. They say that things are as a person sees them, but this is not true: things are what they are, but a person will have to pay for how he sees them. Truth is created from the point of view of the one who acts. With any choice, you should remember that you have to pay for everything, especially for pleasure. Therefore, first it is better to calculate: “How much will you have to pay for this?”

Any previously committed action presses on until it receives its explanation. Our defects, conscious or unconscious, receive increasing tribute from the quantum of our vital reality.

The subject does not see this, but understands that he is falling into the abyss, that he feels bad, that he will not achieve success. In fact, he is bitterly paying for his specific choices, specific love affairs, not only past ones, but also current ones, daily, everyday ones. A mistake not only presents a bill for payment, but also determines a personality style, a vice; it structures deviation. And vice versa, a victorious action gives profit and develops style: by making a profit, you grow, increase yourself.

All of the above should not cause despondency in a person, but, on the contrary, is intended to encourage him, because at the end of life what remains is what is done and given: worthy actions determine a worthy life. It is necessary to do and give always taking into account individual interest, which is then confirmed by social function. Correctly guessed actions represent a huge capital in the bank of existence. Well-made things save, help, protect, allowing you to live on interest. Life is conservative in good and evil.

During the karma phase, it is necessary to remain steadfast in the ordinary daily routine of normal life until Ying-se perks up, making one feel the approach of spring. However, this is not yet the time for sowing: you must act carefully, in humble and silent expectation, living each day as if you were a small official in the service of existence. The time to be an entrepreneur in life will come later.

At first the subject is free to posit or not posit an object, but as soon as the object is posited, it appeals to the positer. Res clamat ad dominum: a thing strives for its owner. In order to change, you need to put the brakes on the wrong thing and wait for it to disappear on its own. It's like office files with files: until they perform a certain function, completing their journey, they need to be stored until their bureaucratic death. It’s the same in karma - you have to wait until the erroneous action, having ceased to receive nutrition from the subject, exhausts itself on its own.

CHAPTER FOUR. COGNITION

4.1. Semantic field 131