A guy fell in love with his best friend, what should he do? Fell in love with my best friend. The friendship period is short

Surely you are reading this article because suddenly the realization came to your mind: “I fell in love with a friend!” Confusion, confusion, stupor. What to do? Without panic, let’s calmly look into the situation together with psychologists and find the best way out of this situation.

You have a man who you called your best friend until recently. Perhaps you have been friends since childhood or studied together at school and college. He was always by your side in difficult moments, helped in everything, you trusted him with your deepest secrets... And suddenly you realize that you began to experience not friendly feelings for him, but something more. This is what psychologists advise you to do first.

Assess your feelings

Perhaps this is not falling in love, but, for example, jealousy of another girl from your environment, to whom your friend began to show increased attention. If this is jealousy, try to analyze the situation from all sides, weigh all the pros and cons, look into the future (imagine communicating with this man on a different level).

Take action

If you are confident in your own feelings and can firmly say to yourself “I fell in love with a friend!”, then start acting. Your huge advantage is that you know this person perfectly from all sides - what he likes and what he doesn’t, his preferences in food and clothing, his hobbies and interests, and so on. And most importantly, he trusts you. You have to put your knowledge about it into practice.

Romance

Create a romantic atmosphere between you and him. For example, invite him to go with you to a play about romantic love or to a tearful melodrama in a movie. Take him out into nature to admire a beautiful sunset. Or for a poetry evening (if he loves poetry). You know about his preferences - and the cards are in your hands! The main thing is to act gently and unobtrusively so as not to scare him with your new feelings.


Change your image

Let him see you in a new way. If you have been “in the board” until now - in torn jeans, with a baseball cap on your head and sneakers, appear before him in beautiful dress and stiletto heels, with an elegant hairstyle and gorgeous makeup. This will definitely surprise him and make him think about your crush on someone. It is likely that he will become jealous of an unknown “rival”, which will force him to do something to keep you near him. Well, if he guesses that your feelings are directed towards him, he will probably appreciate it!

Touch

Fell in love with a friend? Touch it as often as possible! “Randomly” touch your shoulder and palms. Take his hand more often. Place your hand on his knee when you sit next to him. Not a single touch escapes male attention, so use this technique as often as possible.

Shared trip

Invite a friend to accompany you on a short trip somewhere by the sea. And appear before him on the beach in all your beauty - let him appreciate your body, and not just your inner world! Show your practicality during the trip - guys appreciate this in girls, so don’t miss the opportunity to show your best side.


Compliments

Don't forget about them. Praise the guy for his taste in clothes, his ability to drive a car, his success in his career and in sports. Only sincerely and sincerely. Tell him that you feel very comfortable around him. What is he to you? ideal man. It is quite possible that he himself will be the first to confess to you that he is also in love with you.

Make him jealous

Go with him to some social event (or just to public place, where there are many men). Dress as attractively as possible, take care of your hair and makeup. Let your friend see how fans begin to circle around you, this will help “open” his eyes and look at you in a new way. All men love it when their woman attracts attention. If your friend is an owner, he will definitely take the first step, reconsidering his views on you and seeing a desirable woman in you.


Watch

Remember what kind of women your friend likes, what character traits attract him, how he reacts to different young ladies. Use this knowledge to your advantage. And also compare how he behaves with you and how he behaves with other women. It may very well be that he also has similar feelings for you, but is afraid to admit it to both you and himself.

Flirt with him, flirt with him using gestures and glances and watch his reaction. Psychologists believe that if you have fallen in love with a friend, you should not tell him about it directly; it is better to first act with hints that you are not indifferent to him. If his feelings are reciprocated, he will open up to you. But if you directly declare your love, and his answer is negative, most likely the friendship will end.

Perhaps this is for the best - after breaking up with a friend, you can find a man who will reciprocate your feelings. That is, you will open the way to new acquaintances. It's up to you to decide anyway.

I hope that if you have fallen in love with a friend, this article has helped you at least a little to deal with the situation.

You can read more about friendship between a man and a woman.

Wish you happiness!

And smile in conclusion:

"- Expensive! And when we made love last night, were you really not pretending?

- No, honey, I wasn’t pretending. I was really asleep..."

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Good day, dear readers. Today you will learn what to do if you fall in love with a friend. You will learn how to find out if a guy has reciprocal feelings. You will know whether to talk about your love and how to do it.

How to find out about his feelings

If this happens, the girl realizes that she has fallen in love with best friend, the first thing that begins to worry is whether the young man will want to change the role of a comrade to a beloved guy. You need to think about it: perhaps your feelings did not arise out of nowhere; they are a consequence of the fact that a friend has been experiencing loving affection for a long time and showing signs of attention. It is possible that the guy himself is afraid to talk about what is in his heart, he does not want to risk friendly relations, because this way he may be left alone. In such a situation, it would be a good idea to talk with mutual friends, just do it not directly, but try to carefully find out. It is possible that they themselves will begin to tell you that a friend is somehow especially looking in your direction or showing concern. They have long guessed about his feelings.

Friends communicate closely and spend a lot of time together. In order to understand what is in a friend’s heart, you just need to observe his manners, behavior, and gaze.

  1. A young man never turns his back to you.
  2. Almost constantly looks straight into the eyes.
  3. Doesn't talk about his own ex-girlfriends, victories over them.
  4. People around you will behave differently than they do around friends.
  5. The guy often gives “friendly” gifts.
  6. The young man tries to spend as much time as possible next to you.
  7. The guy is interested in your life and helps in case of trouble.
  8. Shows obvious concern and is worried about you.

To confess or not

If you know that your friend isn't dating anyone right now, it might be time to talk about your feelings. What can push you to this is that the guy often, supposedly as a joke, hugs, kisses on the cheek, and tries in every possible way to protect. You must understand that long time You won’t be able to hide your feelings because they will become too obvious. Well, why bother and try to hide something, it’s better to tell everything honestly.

Of course, it is possible that your friend will be stunned; it turns out that he does not feel anything close to that. In some cases, a young man will simply need time to think about everything; perhaps he himself has long ago changed his attitude towards you, but is afraid to admit it to himself.

The girl must be prepared for the fact that after everything becomes known, she may lose her boyfriend forever. After all, in a situation where one friend’s feelings have grown into love, but the other’s have not, there is nothing else left. Here, in fact, either the feelings turn out to be mutual, and the couple starts dating, or the friends break up, the girl suffers, but over time she meets new love.

Sometimes a young man who does not feel love may agree to become a boyfriend and girlfriend because he does not want to lose a friend in you. Over time, he will either fall in love or understand the meaninglessness of your intimacy, then you will have to break up.

Possible methods

  1. In the presence of a friend, do not think about your former boyfriends. You can say that you dream of starting serious relationship with a man like him.
  2. Invite a friend to a party. Here he will be able to see you in a new light, because you will visit the hairdresser, put on nice outfit. Pre-arrange with a friend whom your friend does not know, so that during the party she will come up and note how beautiful your couple is. And here the main thing is to monitor your friend’s reaction. If he immediately starts to deny your relationship, it means he treats you like a friend. If he remains silent, then you will remain silent. At the end of the party, be sure to retire and tell him about it. Note that you would really make a great couple, I wonder what it would be like if you started dating.
  3. Change your usual environment, you can invite a friend to play tennis or go to the movies, like in a friendly way. Try to create such meetings as often as possible, to be together more.
  4. If your friend does not yet know everything about your hidden talents, perhaps now is the time to demonstrate them to him, to open up in a new way.
  5. Touch him often. Let it be minor touches, straighten his bangs, pat him on the shoulder. Perhaps emotions will awaken in him, the guy will feel the pleasure of your closeness.
  6. Don't hesitate to ask him for help. Afterwards, be sure to say thank you. It is important for a man to feel his strength and feel that he is needed.
  7. Most effective way: You can kiss your friend directly on the lips and see his reaction. If a young man has been suffering from love for a long time, he will reciprocate, pressing his lips even harder. If it comes as a shock to him, you can always say that something has come over you. Let this event be preceded by some positive emotions.
  8. Sometimes no hints help to convey to the guy the awareness of what is in your heart. In this case, all that remains is to speak directly about your feelings, knowing about possible reactions.
  1. Remember the first time you felt that you were experiencing feelings stronger than friendship. Didn't this arise at the moment when a friend started dating some girl? If yes, you simply have a sense of ownership, because now you need to share it with someone. In this case, most likely you will not lose the friendship, unless new girl will not turn him against you.
  2. Flirt with your friend, but don't make any promises. It is important that he sees an attractive girl next to him, and not “his boy” who was running around with him in the yard.
  3. Try to provoke him to jealousy. If a friend finds your meetings with another man unpleasant, it means he is not indifferent.
  4. If you have doubts about reciprocity, you can suggest a friendly trip to the cinema to watch a film about love. This way, you will unobtrusively hint to your friend about your feelings. At the same time, such an invitation will not cause violent resistance.
  5. Start touching him more often, do it without excess, in a friendly way. Over time, let them develop into the category of soulful and affectionate. If you hug when you meet, hold him longer in your arms.
  6. You have probably been friends for more than one year and know a lot about your friend, about his views on girls, about what he likes. Now nothing prevents him from becoming that ideal.
  7. If you feel that your friend is breathing unevenly, but for some reason is in no hurry to talk about his feelings, you can take the first step, invite him to a cafe, to a romantic meeting.
  8. It is not recommended to abruptly communicate your feelings to a friend. It’s better to prepare it, start hinting from afar.
  9. In order for a guy to look at you from a different angle, it is recommended to change yours or at least change in some way. For example, if you and a friend always run in sportswear and sneakers, it’s time to put on a skirt, let your hair down, and put on heels. Let your friend see that next to him is not “his boy,” but a beautiful beauty.

In fact, it is far from a rare case when a guy and a girl are friends and then fall in love. If you have such feelings, this is a pattern, because you spend a lot of time together, have known each other for a long time, and probably have common interests and views on life. It's so wonderful when your best friend becomes your favorite man. Just don’t be afraid of losing friendship, continue to remain silent, hiding what’s in your heart. The girl must understand that all this time the guy can be tormented by his feelings.

Hello! My name is Egor, I'm 18 years old. And I began to feel some kind of craving for guys. Also, I happened to fall in love with my best friend. All the time I want to touch him somehow, look at him. Recently he saw off some girl, and I surprised myself. Jealousy. Very great jealousy. At night I dream about him again. And it seems to me that he is already beginning to suspect something about my feelings. I don’t know what to do.. Thoughts slipped through that it was better to die than if he found out about it. I hope that you will help me understand myself, calm me down to some extent and tell me what is better - to hide further, or to confess. Thank you very much!

Fell in love with your best friend, should you hide or confess?

Dear Egor,
Very often in adolescence feelings for people of the same sex arise. This is quite common and does not make you homosexual. If you are confident in your sexual orientation and your jealousy is a consequence of real feelings, then this completely changes the matter. It all depends on the degree of your friendship and the level of your mutual understanding.
In Western psychology and psychiatry, it is customary to advise opening up in such cases and not keeping these feelings to yourself. The more you hide them, the greater the emotional burden it will be for you. If you are sure that he can understand, then confess. Unfortunately, the risk of losing a friend is great, especially in Russian society.
Try to find out his attitude towards gays, and based on this, make a decision. In the end, your own health is more important. Suppressed emotions very often lead to unwanted mental problems.
The main thing is to remember that your condition is NORMAL, you are healthy and there is nothing wrong with the fact that you adhere to a different sexual orientation.
Good luck with the upcoming ones too! NATA KARLIN

There are many opinions. But, for the most part, it ends in love relationships. Did you go to the same group? kindergarten, then we studied in the same class, he always carried your briefcase. You were always sure that he was there, you had someone to rely on, and someone to tell about your troubles. And now, you are already adults who continue to be friends, but you began to understand that your feelings are... You fell in love with your best friend! What to do in this situation, and is it necessary to do anything at all?

You are in love with your best friend: what to do?

The first thing that begins to torment you is whether the person who has been your devoted friend for so long will be able to? And most importantly, will he want it? You have a difficult task to answer these two questions.

Think about it, is your feeling for your friend so groundless?

He, just like you, is afraid of his feelings and afraid of losing your friendship.

Try asking your mutual friends. They certainly see from the outside how your friend really treats you. In addition, he may let one of his friends know about his true feelings for you.
Talk to him as only a woman can talk - but without making any promises.
Try to make the young man see in you not only the girl with whom he climbed trees and raced on a bicycle. You are already an adult lady, and you know for sure that you are attractive to men. Try calling . Men usually react extremely negatively to the appearance of an opponent. If earlier love was dormant in him, because he knew that you belonged only to him, then at this moment it can break out.
Create for him - a horse ride, a boat ride on the river, about love. Do everything in such a way as to subtly hint to the guy about your feelings, but do not scare them with an aggressive display.

Any relationship between people (friendship, love, family) is impossible without touching and hugging. Therefore, make your touches gentle and soulful. Hold his hand in yours a little longer, press him a little tighter to you.
The answer to the question of what to do if you fall in love with your best friend is simple - remain yourself. Perhaps, having thrown away the guise of a shirtless guy, and a sexy one, you will be the first to hear from someone who is so dear to you.
You are an adult girl who has known your friend for more than one year. Remember everything he said about the opposite sex. Definitely something you should know, your friend. Start approaching this image with all seriousness. Finally, make a date with him in a cozy place where pleasant music plays and delicious food is prepared. Chat, dance, maybe on this day you will hear from your friend what you are waiting for, or decide to take this step yourself.

If you are planning a vacation, invite a friend to spend it together. You have common interests, you have something to talk about, you will definitely have fun together. There, under the palm trees, on the shores of the bluest ocean, you can confess to your friend how you feel about him. In addition, you will spend a long time together. A young man will be able to see that you have excellent taste, a wonderful figure, and besides, you are also a very practical girl who knows exactly in what situation and how to do the right thing.

Think about it: at what point did you realize that you loved your best friend? Did this period coincide with the time when a girl appeared in his life? Maybe you, driven by , are simply trying to “take away” what’s yours? Perhaps there are no feelings at all, but you are trying to keep a person near you? In that case, don't worry. Men are too freedom-loving; your friendship will always have a place in his life.

But, if you understand that you really love this person, and jealousy has absolutely nothing to do with it, fight, act!

Don’t give in to despondency and don’t hide “in your shell,” it won’t help. Don’t give up on what you’ve been building for so many years – your relationship.

Take a closer look at how the young man communicates with other girls who could become his passions. Compare what the difference is between his communication with girls and his communication with you. Relationships like “my boyfriend” or “I really appreciate you” can be distinguished instantly. Only “my boyfriend” is unlikely to turn into love, and “I appreciate you” easily turns into “I love you madly.” If in the first case, you will have to work on yourself and make drastic changes in the relationship (this will take more than one day), then in the second case, the guy is already ready for love. If he is used to treating you as a friend for games and entertainment, then it will be difficult for a person to change his attitude. Although, the moment he understands that it is very important for life that partners understand each other at a glance, he will definitely decide that you are exactly the right person. Just don’t act spontaneously, let everything take its course.

How to confess your love to your best friend

You, like no one else, should know if your best friend has a girlfriend. If not, confess your love to him. If before this day your friend gently hugged you by the shoulders and kissed you on the cheek, supposedly as a joke, now you can find out the true motives of his actions. At this moment it will become clear whether it is manifestations of friendship or a desire to love and protect you.

If you understand that, don't hide it. This cannot go on for long; soon your impulses will become clear to everyone without words. And breaking up with a loved one because of your shyness will be very painful. By telling the truth about your feelings, you will hear in response what the person really feels for you. No matter how bitter the truth is, it is always better than the unknown and mental anguish.

The minute you are alone with the person you now love, gently take his hand, pull the person towards you, and kiss him. Just do it with all the tenderness you can muster. The main thing is to remember that neither you nor your friend is to blame for the fact that the friendship is gone, and other feelings have replaced it. Don't blame anyone for this.

Don't cry or throw tantrums. A person will be able to see the depth of your feelings later. For now, you are faced with the task of telling them that they exist at all, that you cannot live without this person. With a fit of sobbing, you will simply scare the guy, and he will decide that you are hysterical. A man who enters into a love relationship with a woman fears her tears. For him, this is a signal that more than one million nerve cells will have to be destroyed. After all, you will need to calm down this crybaby. Therefore, a guy will think a hundred times before he begins to connect his life with a whiny girl.

In addition, if you calm down and behave with dignity, it will be easier for you to see the response young man. Note that for him your recognition is as much a surprise as your feelings are for you. If the young man does not immediately respond to your impulse, do not be upset and do not rush him.

It happens that a guy courted you for a long time, but you could not accept him as a partner. Although, friendships took root and grew into... After some time, you realize that now you love this person. However, don't rush! Perhaps over such a long time his attitude towards you has changed.

It is worth noting that, no matter what you do, from the moment you realize that you love your best friend, the previous relationship between you will never be the same. You are no longer friends, you are people who must decide whether you should continue to be together or not. There are two options:

You stay together, just in a different status;
You are breaking up.

1 March 2014, 15:39

Love sets cunning traps for us, from which it is sometimes not so easy to escape. Passions, betrayals, suffering, stormy clarifications - all these are different faces of love. Each of us learns our own lesson from relationships on the path to true happiness.

One of the most difficult situations- falling in love with a person with whom you want to be together, but you can’t. Let's talk about what to do if you fall in love with your boyfriend's friend, and your whole life has gone topsy-turvy. There is a way out of every situation if you can understand yourself.

  • How did you end up falling in love with your boyfriend's friend?

Everything was fine with you until one fine day your boyfriend introduced you to his friend. Perhaps he turned out to be a stunning tall blond or, conversely, an unremarkable young man in appearance.

But something turned upside down in your soul, and you realized that you couldn’t live without him. Time passes, but your thoughts are only about him. You have become indifferent and absent-minded towards your former boyfriend.

Gradually you begin to understand that you have fallen in love with your boyfriend's friend, but what to do? Leave someone you've been with for several months, or even years? Maybe get rid of new love from your head? What if it doesn't work out? Similar feelings are experienced by a young man who, unexpectedly for himself, is afraid to admit this to her so as not to spoil the relationship.

In any case, such a situation represents a serious test. There is no need to rush into making a final decision. Take a time out for a few days and don’t communicate with your boyfriend or his friend. Now you need time to think in order to make an informed decision. Feelings can be very strong, but this does not mean that you should follow your passions and, as they say, throw yourself into the pool headlong. Let's try to consider why this feeling came over you.

  • The sweetness of the forbidden fruit or true love?

If you look at any forum dedicated to relationships, you will see that you are far from alone. Many girls discuss the topic “fell in love with her boyfriend’s friend.” You can read advice, many of which contradict each other. It’s better not to listen to anyone, but to think with your own head. First, it’s worth answering the question: why did it happen that a stranger turned out to be more attractive to you than your boyfriend?

As Sigmund Freud argued, every desire we have has its own reasons. Maybe something in your relationship didn’t suit you, and you, without realizing it, were looking for another man? Some young girls test their charms, proving that they can, and then they themselves get carried away and fall in love with their victim. Has something similar happened to you?

Or maybe your boyfriend's friend attracts you with his inaccessibility, and your feelings only seem strong? Try to ask yourself these questions and answer them sincerely. It also happens that a girl falls in love with a friend of her fiancé or husband because she is offended by her partner. She understands that this will be a real blow for her man, and falling in love turns out to be a kind of revenge.

Or maybe it's not all about you, and in fact you experienced a real feeling when you fell in love with your boyfriend's best friend. Then all you have to do is resolve the situation as tactfully as possible, so as not to hurt your ex-lover.